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The chart below shows the amount of money per week spent on fast foods in Britain. The line graph shows the trends in consumption of the fast foods.

The chart below shows the amount of money per week spent on fast foods in Britain. The line graph shows the trends in consumption of the fast foods. rR7L
The bar chart illustrates the amount of salary consumed on fast foods in Britain and the line chart reveals utilization of fast foods between 1970 and 1990. Overall, it is saw that the maximum amount of income spent on hamburger in all three cases. In the other side, hamburger is also maximum consumption food over the time period. As shown in the graph, 45 pence per person drained their money in hamburger in high income category. The amount of spent money is almost same in case of fish and pizzas which is between 20 and 50 pence per person. In the average income people burnt out their money in hamburger(35 pence per person) whereas other consumed amount is 25 pence per fish and chips, 11 pence per pizzas. In contrast, fish and chips are the highest food source rather than both of source which is 18 pence per person. While people used money on remaining fast foods. On the other side, In 1970, humans used fish and chips approximate 300 grams afterward the graph significantly decreased from 1975 to 1990. The expenditure hamburger was 100 grams in 1970 and then it was rose rapidly between 1975 and 1990. Eventually, pizzas remaining same (50 grams)from 1970 to 1980 subsequently it was climbed significantly at 100 grams in 1990.
The bar chart illustrates the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of salary consumed on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
in Britain and the line chart reveals utilization of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
between 1970 and 1990.
Overall
, it is
Consider using a past participle here: "sawed", "sawn", "seen".
saw
that the maximum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of income spent on hamburger in all three cases. In the other side, hamburger is
also
maximum consumption
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
over the time period.

As shown in the graph, 45 pence per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
drained their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
in hamburger in high income category. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of spent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
is almost same in case of fish and pizzas which is between 20 and 50 pence per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
. In the average income
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
burnt out their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
in hamburger(35 pence per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person)
whereas other consumed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
is 25 pence per fish and chips, 11 pence per pizzas.
In contrast
, fish and chips are the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
source
rather
than both of source which is 18 pence per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
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money
on remaining
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
foods.

On the other side, In 1970, humans
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
fish and chips approximate 300 grams afterward the graph
significantly
decreased from 1975 to 1990. The expenditure hamburger was 100 grams in 1970 and then it was rose
rapidly
between 1975 and 1990.
Eventually
, pizzas remaining same (50 grams)from 1970 to 1980
subsequently
it
was climbed
significantly
at 100 grams in 1990.
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IELTS academic The chart below shows the amount of money per week spent on fast foods in Britain. The line graph shows the trends in consumption of the fast foods.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
217 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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