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The Chart Below Show Information About Honey-Bee Colonies And Honey Production In The US

The bar charts illustrate the number of beehives and the change in the amount of honey produced in the US from 1970 to 2010. Firstly, we see an ascent of the chart so that the number of honey-bee hives rose slightly from 4 million in 1970 to about 4. 2 million in 1980. But over the next three decades, that amount dropped dramatically. Thus, the number of beehives decreased by 3. 5 million in 1990, and over the next 20 years, between 2000 and 2010, these numbers fell from 2. 6 million to 1. 8 million. In the case of honey production, while the number of beehives had increased by 0. 2 million, we are witnessing a decrease in honey production from 130, 000 tonnes per year in 1970 to 110, 000 tonnes in 1980 before recovering to 120, 000 tonnes in 1990. Then the amount of honey production decreases continuously every 10 years. Thus, between 2000 and 2010, this amount decreased to 100, 000 tonnes and 70, 000 tonnes, respectively. In conclusion, there is not a truly directed relationship between the number of beehives and honey production, because when colonies rose in 1980, honey production fell. On the other hand, when colonies decreased in 1990, honey production increased. However, in general, there is a decreasing trend in the number of beehives and a decrease in honey production over a period of 40 years.
The bar charts illustrate the
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number
of beehives and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in the
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amount
of honey produced in the US from 1970 to 2010.

Firstly
, we
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see
an ascent of the chart
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so
that the
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number
of honey-bee hives rose
slightly
from 4
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million
in 1970 to about 4. 2
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million
in 1980.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
over the
next
three decades, that
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amount
dropped
dramatically
.
Thus
, the
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number
of beehives decreased by 3. 5
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million
in 1990, and over the
next
20 years, between 2000 and 2010, these
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numbers
fell from 2. 6
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million
to 1. 8 million.

In the case of honey
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production
, while the
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number
of beehives had increased by 0. 2
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million
, we are witnessing a decrease in honey
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production
from 130, 000 tonnes per
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year
in 1970 to 110, 000 tonnes in 1980
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
recovering to 120, 000 tonnes in 1990. Then the
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amount
of honey
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production
decreases
continuously
every 10 years.
Thus
, between 2000 and 2010, this
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amount
decreased to 100, 000 tonnes and 70, 000 tonnes,
respectively
.

In conclusion
, there is not a
truly
directed relationship between the
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number
of beehives and honey
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
when colonies rose in 1980, honey
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production
fell.
On the other hand
, when colonies decreased in 1990, honey
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
increased.
However
,
in general
, there is a decreasing trend in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of beehives and a decrease in honey
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
over a period of 40 years.
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IELTS academic The Chart Below Show Information About Honey-Bee Colonies And Honey Production In The US

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
234 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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