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The below shows graph percentage of people visiting the theater once a month more by distinct groups in Great Britain.

The below shows graph percentage of people visiting the theater once a month more by distinct groups in Great Britain. DlOjW
The given line graph illustrates the information about proportion of masses visiting the theater once a month or more by distinct groups in Great Britain. In an overview, it is vivid that maximum percentage of people attended the cinema of 15-24 age, while 35 and over age masses were at minimum rate. By examining, it is evident that 15-24 age of people visited the cinema started with nearly 15% and gradually increased by 43% in 2008. After that, 50% of individual visited the movie hall once a month of 15-24 aged in 2018. Moving further, in 2000, about 10% of folks visited the cinema and in next year some variations observed under 14 age of people attended the cinema who were 30% and under 40% in 2010 and 2018 respectively. Further analzying, approximately 5% of masses attended the cinema in 2000 and in next years it gradually increased to 25% in 2010. In 2018, near by 35% of individual visited the theater. Moreover, initially approximately 2% of people attended movie hall by 35 and over age and in next year significantly inclined to 20% in 2018.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
line graph illustrates the information about proportion of masses visiting the theater once a month or more by distinct groups in Great Britain. In an overview, it is vivid that maximum percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
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attended
the
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cinema
of 15-24
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age
, while 35 and over
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age
masses were at minimum rate. By examining, it is evident that 15-24
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age
of
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people
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visited
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
with
nearly
15% and
gradually
increased by 43% in 2008. After that, 50% of individual
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visited
the movie hall once a month of 15-24 aged in 2018. Moving
further
, in 2000, about 10% of folks
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visited
the
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cinema
and in
next
year
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
variations observed under 14
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age
of
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people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attended
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
who were 30% and under 40% in 2010 and 2018
respectively
.
Further
Possible spelling mistake found.
analzying
, approximately 5% of masses
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attended
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
in 2000 and in
next
years it
gradually
increased to 25% in 2010. In 2018,
Did you mean "nearby"?
near by
35% of individual
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visited
the theater.
Moreover
,
initially
approximately 2% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attended
movie hall by 35 and over
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
and in
next
year
significantly
inclined to 20% in 2018.
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IELTS academic The below shows graph percentage of people visiting the theater once a month more by distinct groups in Great Britain.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
186 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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