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the bar sharts show the reulsts of three teems from 2002 to 2005

the bar sharts show the reulsts of three teems from 2002 to 2005 YLX9d
The bar chart provides information on the results of three teams between 2002 and 2005 Overall, scores of and c team decreased over the given period, while the scores of a team showed upward trend. A team had the lowest points at the beginning of the period but ended up outracing c team in the final year According to the data, B team leaded other two teams with significantly higher points and despite the fluctuation in the numbers and the decrease in points over time the team still remained first in 2005 with 55 points. Scores of C team increased in the following year to 15 points but after this they experienced decline to 5 points in the last year A teams score went through some variations, it started from the lowest 5 points in the initial year and climbed up to 35 points in 2004. However, numbers drop to 8 points in 2006 but it exceeded c team in the end.
The bar chart provides information on the results of three
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teams
between 2002 and 2005

Overall
,
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scores
of and c
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team
decreased over the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period, while the
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scores
of a
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team
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
upward trend. A
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team
had the lowest
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points
at the beginning of the period
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
ended up outracing c
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team
in the final
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
year


According to the data, B
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team
leaded other two
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teams
with
significantly
higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
points
and despite the fluctuation in the numbers and the decrease in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
points
over time the
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team
still
remained
first
in 2005 with 55
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points
.
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Scores
of C
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
increased in the following year to 15
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
points
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
after this they experienced decline to 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
points
in the last
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
year


A
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teams
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
score
went through
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
variations, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
from the lowest 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
points
in the initial year and climbed up to 35
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points
in 2004.
However
, numbers drop to 8
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points
in 2006
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it exceeded c
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
.

IELTS academic the bar sharts show the reulsts of three teems from 2002 to 2005

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
162 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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