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The bar chart shows the percentage of elderly citizens in three countries in 1980, 2000, and 2030.

The bar chart shows the percentage of elderly citizens in three countries in 1980, 2000, and 2030. qqPG
The bar graph compares the percentage of population whose ages are 65 and over in three different nations in 1980, 2000, and 2030. Overall, the percentage of old man has increased in all given countries since 1980 and will continue rising to 2030, among that Germany had and will have the most percentage of old people in these given years. In details, the percentage of elders was 10% in Canada in 1980, which was 5% less than that in Germany at 15%. In addition, about 14% of total population was 65 ages or over in UK in the same year. Furthermore, Germany’ elderly citizens accounted for one-fifth of the total population in 2000, which was 5% more than that in Canada and UK at both 15%. Nearly 21% of all people living in Canada will be elderly in 2030, which is just 2% more than that in UK at 19%. As for Germany, one out off four persons will be an old man in 2030, which is 4% more than that in Canada.
The bar graph compares the
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percentage
of population whose ages are 65 and over in three
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different
nations in 1980, 2000, and 2030.

Overall
, the
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percentage
of
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old
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
has increased in all
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given
countries since 1980 and will continue rising to 2030, among that Germany had and will have the most
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percentage
of
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old
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people
in these
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given
years.

In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
, the
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percentage
of elders was 10% in Canada in 1980, which was 5% less than that in Germany at 15%.
In addition
, about 14% of total population was 65 ages or over in UK in the same year.
Furthermore
, Germany’ elderly citizens accounted for one-fifth of the total population in 2000, which was 5% more than that in Canada and UK at both 15%.

Nearly
21% of all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
living in Canada will be elderly in 2030, which is
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just
2% more than that in UK at 19%. As for Germany, one out off four persons will be an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
in 2030, which is 4% more than that in Canada.
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IELTS academic The bar chart shows the percentage of elderly citizens in three countries in 1980, 2000, and 2030.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
173 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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