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The bar chart shows the average size class in primary school and lower secondary school

The bar chart shows the average size class in primary school and lower secondary school PkpeB
The bar chart provides information about the medium size class in primary school and lower secondary schools in(UK, Mexico, Denmark, Iceland, Japan, South Korea, and World)in the year 2006. Overall, it can be seen that the number of lower secondary school was bigger than primary school. the quantity of student of the other countries such as(Korea, Japan) was higher than the other countries in the bar chart. In 2006, South Kees, Japan, and the UK all had larger primary schools classes when compared with the world average. South Korea made up the largest in the bar chart, to around 35. Whereas, in Japan was lower slightly, just over 20. Following that, there was a moderate decrease well under 30 In the same year, South Korea, Japan, Mexico, and the world took up the highest proportion in the year 2006, but South Korea had the biggest lower secondary, at 35. However, Joan was lower minimally, to 34. Mexico and the world were similar, considerably more than 30 over the period shown
The bar chart provides information about the medium size
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
in primary
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school
and lower secondary
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schools
in(UK, Mexico, Denmark, Iceland,
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Japan
, South Korea, and World)in the year 2006.
Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the number of lower secondary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
was bigger than primary
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school
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
quantity of student of the other countries such as(Korea,
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Japan)
was higher than the other countries in the bar chart. In 2006, South
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Kees
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Japan
, and the UK all had larger primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
classes when compared with the world average. South Korea made up the largest in the bar chart, to around 35. Whereas, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Japan
was lower
slightly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over 20. Following that, there was a moderate decrease well under 30 In the same year, South Korea,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Japan
, Mexico, and the world took up the highest proportion in the year 2006,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
South Korea had the biggest lower secondary, at 35.
However
, Joan was lower
minimally
, to 34. Mexico and the world were similar,
considerably
more than 30 over the period
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
shown
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IELTS academic The bar chart shows the average size class in primary school and lower secondary school

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
169 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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