Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The bar chart illustrates the results of a survey of adolescents about the age range participants think certain rights and responsibilities should be granted to young people.

The bar chart illustrates the results of a survey of adolescents about the age range participants think certain rights and responsibilities should be granted to young people. nNBK2
The bar chart illustrates the results of a survey of adolescents about the age range participants think certain rights and responsibilities should be granted to young people. There were 1000 people from five countries and they had numerous opinions about the appropriate age for taking rights and responsibilities. The age for get married people believed is from sixteen years old in Mexico and Egypt to twenty-two years old in Japan. Both in USA and UK, people chose eighteen. The similar trend happens for voting. This was the highest among Japan participants and the lowest point (16) in UK and Mexico. Interestingly, the age for taking criminal responsibility is the lowest. In USA, adolescents believed they should be held reponsible for their crime. Japanese participants also chose the highest age at eighteen years old. In short, the results show that adolescents from different countries have different views about when it is suitable for young people to hold rights and reponsibilities.
The bar chart illustrates the results of a survey of adolescents about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
range participants
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
certain rights and responsibilities should
be granted
to young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

There were 1000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from five
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
countries and
they had numerous opinions about the appropriate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
for taking rights and responsibilities. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
married
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believed is from sixteen years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
in Mexico and Egypt to twenty-two years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
in Japan. Both
A determiner is probably missing here: "in the USA".
in USA
and UK,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
chose eighteen.

The similar trend happens for voting. This was the highest among Japan participants and the lowest point (16) in UK and Mexico.

Interestingly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
for taking criminal responsibility is the lowest.
A determiner is probably missing here: "In the USA".
In USA
, adolescents believed they should
be held
Possible spelling mistake found.
reponsible
for their crime. Japanese participants
also
chose the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
at eighteen years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
.

In short, the results
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that adolescents from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
views about when it is suitable for young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to hold rights and
Possible spelling mistake found.
reponsibilities
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS academic The bar chart illustrates the results of a survey of adolescents about the age range participants think certain rights and responsibilities should be granted to young people.

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
159 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts
  • 5band
    The ​given charts illustrate the distribution of world's water, and usage in Egypt, Saudi Arabia, and Canada for agricultural, domestic and industrial purpose.
    The given charts illustrate the distribution of world's water, and usage in Egypt, Saudi Arabia, and Canada for agricultural, domestic and industrial purpose. Overall, majority of water available as salt water while, fresh is merely less on the earth. On the other hand, the lowest amount of water u...
  • 6band
    The diagram illustrates how to produce pencil.
    The diagram illustrates how to produce pencil. In general, a closer look at the figure highlights the fact that the process of producing pencil involves 10 separate stages, commemcing with planting trees and finishing with packing pencil for sale. Looking in the diagram in the more detail, in the ...
  • 5.5band
    Main causes of land dedradation
    The pie chart Illustrate the significant cause in low effective farmland. While in 1990s the table describe how land degeneration affect in the three north-western country. Overall humiliation reasons that spread through deforestation as well as over cultivation. Although the European region is mor...
  • 5.5band
    the main causes of land degradation
    The pie chart Illustrate the significant cause in low effective farmland. While in the 1990s the table describe how land degeneration affect in the three north-western country. Overall humiliation reasons that spread through deforestation as well as over cultivation. Although the European region is...
  • 6.5band
    Steps on making sugar from sugarcanes
    The diagram illustrates the steps of how sugar is manufactured from sugar canes. Overall, there are 6 steps in the production process of sugar which were once a part crops known as sugar canes. The steps include growing, harvesting, crushing, purifying, evaporating, separating, and drying. The fir...
  • 5.5band
    Renovations for South West Airport Map
    The Map details the plans for the renovation in the next year of South West Airport. Looking from an overall perspective, it is steadily apparent that the number of gates will greatly expand and a variety of customer-facing facilities will be added including shops, car hire and an ATM. The locations...





Get more results for topic:
  • The bar chart illustrates the results of a survey of adolescents about the age range participants think certain rights and responsibilities should be granted to young people.