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The bar chart illustrates the number of worldwide sales of video games for four different kinds, namely mobile phones, online, console and handheld device from 2000 to 2006.

The bar chart illustrates the number of worldwide sales of video games for four different kinds, namely mobile phones, online, console and handheld device from 2000 to 2006. 0M1o3
The bar chart illustrates the number of worldwide sales of video games for four different kinds, namely mobile phones, online, console and handheld device from 2000 to 2006. Overall, it is clear that sales of games for three of four platforms rose significantly while the figure for console games slightly declined over the period. According to the data, the global sales of handheld games had nearly 12 billion dollars in 2000, whereas the sale for console game was must lower at approximately 6 billion dollars. The figures for mobile phone and online games did not appear at that year. Over the next three years, the number of sale for handheld games increase to around 12. 5 billion dollars. In contrast, the trend for console games decreased slightly to 5 billion dollars. Sales of both mobile phone and online game were around 2 billion dollars. To draw a comparison, the figure for handheld games has a steady rise to reach the highest point 17 billion dollars in 2006. On the other hand, the number of console games noticeably dropped to nearly 3 billion dollars at the end of the given period. Meanwhile, revenue from online and console game were around 9 and 7 billion dollars respectively.
The bar chart illustrates the number of worldwide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
for four
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kinds,
namely
mobile phones,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
console
and handheld device from 2000 to 2006.

Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
for three of four platforms rose
significantly
while the figure for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
console
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
slightly
declined over the period.

According to the data, the global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of handheld
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
had
nearly
12
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billion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
in 2000, whereas the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sale
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
console
game was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
lower at approximately 6
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
. The figures for mobile phone and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
did not appear at that year. Over the
next
three years, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sale
for handheld
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
increase to around 12. 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
.
In contrast
, the trend for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
console
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
decreased
slightly
to 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sales
of both mobile phone and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
game were around 2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
dollars.

To draw a comparison, the figure for handheld
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
has a steady rise to reach the highest point 17
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
in 2006.
On the other hand
, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
console
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
noticeably
dropped to
nearly
3
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period. Meanwhile, revenue from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
console
game were around 9 and 7
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
respectively
.
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IELTS academic The bar chart illustrates the number of worldwide sales of video games for four different kinds, namely mobile phones, online, console and handheld device from 2000 to 2006.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
205 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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