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The bar chart below shows the percentage of students who passed their high school competency exams, by subject and gender, during the period 2010-2011. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the percentage of students who passed their high school competency exams, by subject and gender, during the period 2010-2011. 8XD5
The bar chart gives information on the proportion of students who passed their exams at high school, by subject and gender, from 2010 to 2011. It is clear that the percentage of girls who passed exams is higher in most subjects throughout the given period. It is also worth pointing out that girls achieve the highest pass rate in computer science, and Mathematics for boys. Looking at the graph in more detail, more than half of the girls passed their computer science exam recording 56. 3% pass rate. This figure was the highest figure among all the subjects, followed by Mathematics at 49. 2%. There was a huge difference by approximately 14. 2% between the figure for boys and girls. As mentioned, the pass rate for mathematics exams was the second highest figure for girls marking about 49. 2%, while the figure for boys recorded about 48. 4%. This figure was the highest pass rate for boys. Nearly half of the candidates despite the gender passed Foregin languages exam. About 47. 4% of female candidates passed the exam, while about 46. 8% of the candidates passed the exam. As far as the pass rate for the Geography exam was concerning for both genders. Only about a fifth of the female candidates passed the exam, while just below one-third of the male candidates passed this exam. This figure for girls was the lowest figure between all the other subjects. As for the Chemistry exam, boys recorded about 14. 1% of pass rate which was the lowest figure, whereas around 10% of girls passed the exam. The figure for Chemistry showed the biggest difference between female and male candidates.
The bar chart gives information on the proportion of students who
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passed
their exams at high school, by
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subject
and gender, from 2010 to 2011.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the percentage of
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girls
who
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passed
exams is higher in most
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subjects
throughout the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period. It is
also
worth pointing out that
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girls
achieve the highest pass
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rate
in computer science, and Mathematics for boys.

Looking at the graph in more detail, more than half of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
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passed
their computer science exam recording 56. 3% pass
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rate
. This
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figure
was the highest
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figure
among all the
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subjects
, followed by Mathematics at 49. 2%. There was a huge difference by approximately 14. 2% between the
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figure
for
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boys
and
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girls
. As mentioned, the pass
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rate
for mathematics exams was the second highest
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figure
for
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girls
marking about 49. 2%, while the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
recorded about 48. 4%. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
was the highest pass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
for
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boys
.
Nearly
half of the
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candidates
despite the gender
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passed
Possible spelling mistake found.
Foregin
languages exam. About 47. 4% of female
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candidates
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passed
the exam, while about 46. 8% of the
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candidates
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passed
the exam.

As far as the pass
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rate
for the Geography exam
The verb 'concerning' is a stative verb and sometimes the progressive form is not correct. Try a simple form instead.
was concerning
for both genders.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Only
about a fifth of the female
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candidates
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passed
the exam, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
below one-third of the male
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candidates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passed
this exam. This
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figure
for
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girls
was the lowest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
between all the other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
. As for the Chemistry exam,
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boys
recorded about 14. 1% of pass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
which was the lowest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
, whereas around 10% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passed
the exam. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
for Chemistry
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
the biggest difference between female and male
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
candidates
.

IELTS academic The bar chart below shows the percentage of students who passed their high school competency exams, by subject and gender, during the period 2010-2011.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
277 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • The bar chart below shows the percentage of students who passed their high school competency exams, by subject and gender, during the period 2010-2011. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.