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The bar chart below shows the number of people in two age groups who join different clubs/associations

The bar chart below shows the number of people in two age groups who join different clubs/associations J3AK0
The bar chart illustrates how many people in two age brackets took part in various clubs/associations. Overall, what stands out from the bar chart is that joining clubs/associations is far more popular for the people in the 20-30-year-old than that in the 45-65 age group exception for historical clubs Looking at the details, in terms of people aged 20-30, the number of people who participate in arts and crafts clubs come top of the chart, with 60, making it slightly more than that in keep fit, social, and other clubs at around 50. As can be seen that a considerably higher number of 45-65-year-olds than 20-30-year-olds joining in historical association with precisely 50 as opposed to nearly 25 The number of people in the oldest age group take part in historical, keep fit and social clubs is ranked equally, with 50. Conversely, other clubs come bottom of chart, with around 10 members, closely followed by art and crafts clubs, with 10 people It is clearly seen that the archaeology clubs attract the number of member both two age group equally
The bar
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chart
illustrates how
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many
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people
in two
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age
brackets
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
took part
in various clubs/associations.

Overall
, what stands out from the bar
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chart
is that joining clubs/associations is far more popular for the
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people
in the 20-30-year-
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
than that in the 45-65
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
group exception for historical clubs

Looking at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
, in terms of
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people
aged 20-30, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who participate in arts and crafts
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clubs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
top of the
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chart
, with 60, making it
slightly
more than that in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
fit, social, and other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clubs
at around 50.

As can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that a
considerably
higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of 45-65-year-olds than 20-30-year-olds joining in historical association with
precisely
50 as opposed to
nearly
25 The
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number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the oldest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
group
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
in historical,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
fit and social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clubs
is ranked
equally
, with 50.
Conversely
, other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clubs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
bottom of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
chart
, with around 10 members,
closely
followed by art and crafts
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clubs
, with 10
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people


It is
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the archaeology
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clubs
attract the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of member both two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
group
equally
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IELTS academic The bar chart below shows the number of people in two age groups who join different clubs/associations

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
179 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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