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The average prices per kilometers of clothing imported into the European Union from six different countries in 1993 and 2003 are shown in the bar chart below.

The average prices per kilometers of clothing imported into the European Union from six different countries in 1993 and 2003 are shown in the bar chart below. A17X
The bar chart provides information about the percentages of six different countries of clothing imported into the European Union between 1993 and 2003 years. Overall, we can see that the proportion of clothing import was marginally greater and remained relatively unchanged. Although the average prices per kilometers clothing import had the same decreases in Japan, China and India, it declined the next country at the end of the period from 1993 to 2003. In 1993, in pounds 28 of Argentina imported the average price per kilometer clothing, and this figure is the highest on the chart. Bangladesh contributed the least price at only £ 3. By 2003, these figures had fallen significantly to £ 26 and £ 6 respectively. The average price per kilometer clothing imported in Brazil also experienced a decrease between 1993 and 2003, around £ 23. While the average price per kilometer clothing imported to India declined across the two years. The percentages of per kilometer clothing of Japan in 1993 dropped much faster than in 2003. The figure for China showed a price in pounds 18 rise, whereas those fell by £ 10.
The bar chart provides information about the percentages of six
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different
countries of clothing
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imported
into the European Union between 1993 and 2003 years.

Overall
, we can
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see
that the proportion of clothing import was
marginally
greater and remained
relatively
unchanged. Although the
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average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
per kilometers clothing import had the same decreases in Japan, China and India, it declined the
next
country at the
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end
of the period from 1993 to 2003.

In 1993, in pounds 28 of Argentina
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imported
the
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average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
per kilometer clothing, and this figure is the highest on the chart. Bangladesh contributed the least
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price
at
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only
The currency mark is usually written without any whitespace: "£3".
£ 3
. By 2003, these figures had fallen
significantly
to
The currency mark is usually written without any whitespace: "£26".
£ 26
and
The currency mark is usually written without any whitespace: "£6".
£ 6
respectively
. The
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average
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price
per kilometer clothing
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imported
in Brazil
also
experienced a decrease between 1993 and 2003, around
The currency mark is usually written without any whitespace: "£23".
£ 23
.

“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
per kilometer clothing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
imported
to India declined across the two years. The percentages of per kilometer clothing of Japan in 1993 dropped much faster than in 2003. The figure for China
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showed
a
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price
in pounds 18
Possible agreement error. The noun 'rise' seems to be countable, so consider using: "rises".
rise
, whereas those fell by
The currency mark is usually written without any whitespace: "£10".
£ 10
.
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IELTS academic The average prices per kilometers of clothing imported into the European Union from six different countries in 1993 and 2003 are shown in the bar chart below.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
187 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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Lexical Resource: 5.5
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Grammatical Range: 6.0
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  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
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    Present relevant ideas
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