Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The australia people doing activity

The australia people doing activity jb7NM
The bar chart explains the percentage of Australian citizens in different age who did regular physical in 2010. The range of ages that 15 to 25 years old, males are more than females. Moreover the percentage of man is 52. 8 as well as girl was 47. 7. Ranging of ages from 25 to34 that showed males were 42. 2 that was less than the women were 48. 9. Duration of ages 35 to 44 that illustrated males were 39. 5 that less than females were 52. 5. Ranging of ages 45 to 54 showed males were 43. 1 that less than females were 53. 3. The range of ages 55 to 64 explained females were 53 that more than males were 45. 1. Ranging of ages 65 and over illustrated male was close to female. In contrary females were 47. 1 as well as males were 46. 7 that mean woman more than man. Consequently the bar chart illustrates Woman doing regular more than men but Ranging of 15 to 24 Men were more than woman.
The bar chart
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
the percentage of Australian citizens in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
who did regular physical in 2010. The range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ages
that 15 to 25 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
males
are more than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Moreover
the percentage of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
is 52. 8
as well
as girl was 47. 7. Ranging of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ages
from 25 to34 that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
males
were 42. 2 that was less than the women were 48. 9. Duration of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ages
35 to 44 that illustrated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
males
were 39. 5 that less than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
were 52. 5. Ranging of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ages
45 to 54
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
males
were 43. 1 that less than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
were 53. 3. The range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ages
55 to 64
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explained
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
were 53 that more than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
males
were 45. 1. Ranging of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ages
65 and over illustrated male was close to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
. In contrary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
were 47. 1
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
males
were 46. 7 that mean woman more than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Consequently
the bar chart illustrates Woman doing regular more than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
Ranging of 15 to 24
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Men
were more than woman.

IELTS academic The australia people doing activity

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
177 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • The australia people doing activity