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The amount of money spent on five consumer goods (cars, computers, books, perfume and cameras) in France and the UK in 2010.

The amount of money spent on five consumer goods (cars, computers, books, perfume and cameras) in France and the UK in 2010. gk0L
The amount of money spent on five consumer goods (cars, computers, books, perfume, and cameras) in France and the UK in 2010. The bar chart demonstrates how much money is spent on five products including cars, computers, books, perfume, and cameras in both France and the United Kingdom in 2010. It is manifestly apparent from the graph that the majority of money is spent on cars in both countries. Based on what is shown, France is spending over 375000 British sterling on computers, the UK has similar spending on computers. It spends 350000 British sterling exactly. Books are the second most spent on a product by the UK with a spend of over 400000, in contrast to France which they only spend 300000 British sterling. Both the UK and France spend on perfumes, they spend 1400000 and 200000 British sterling in a row. Hence, the UK spends the least amount of money on perfumes. Moreover, France spends the least on Camera, it spends only about 150000 British sterling compared to 360000 British sterling spent by the United Kingdom. To sum up, it can be said that both countries have different spending patterns compared to each other.
The amount of
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money
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spent
on five consumer
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goods
(cars, computers, books,
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perfume
, and cameras) in France and the UK in 2010.

The bar chart demonstrates how much
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money
is
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spent
on five products including cars, computers, books,
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perfume
, and cameras in both France and the United Kingdom in 2010. It is
manifestly
apparent from the graph that the majority of
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money
is
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spent
on cars in both countries.

Based on what
is shown
, France is spending over 375000 British
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sterling
on computers, the UK has similar spending on computers. It
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spends
350000 British
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sterling
exactly. Books are the second most
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spent
on a product by the UK with a
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spend
of over 400000,
in contrast
to France which they
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only
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spend
300000 British
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sterling
. Both the UK and France
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spend
on
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perfumes
, they
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spend
1400000 and 200000 British
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sterling
in a row.
Hence
, the UK
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spends
the least amount of
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money
on
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perfumes
.
Moreover
, France
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spends
the least on Camera, it
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spends
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
about 150000 British
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sterling
compared to 360000 British
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sterling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
by the United Kingdom.

To sum up, it can
be said
that both countries have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
spending patterns compared to each other.
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IELTS academic The amount of money spent on five consumer goods (cars, computers, books, perfume and cameras) in France and the UK in 2010.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
196 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
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  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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