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The 2 maps show the changes in a town over a 20-year period

The 2 maps show the changes in a town over a 20-year period W8dW5
The maps illustrate the transformations which happened in a town in the gap of 20 years. Overall, the town witnessed noticeable alterations in accommodation with the significant shifts while there were not huge differences in traffic system. In the north of the town, there was a remarkable increase of residential houses. Meanwhile, a new road was made beside the house area along with some detached houses. On the right of the accommodation zone, farmland together with forest park was cut down to make way for golf amenities and tennis courts. Down to the South, the traffic infrastructure did not change despite all the new construction around. The hotel and the cafe still remained at the same location as before however there was an introduction to the adjacent car park. Not so far from this part of the town, restaurants were replaced by several shops while the demolition of the fish market led to recent apartment blocks. Lastly, the fishing port disappeared in the beach area.
The maps illustrate the transformations which happened in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
in the gap of 20 years.
Overall
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
witnessed noticeable alterations in accommodation with the significant shifts while there were not huge differences in traffic system.

In the north of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
, there was a remarkable increase of residential
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
. Meanwhile, a new road
was made
beside the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
area along with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
detached
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
. On the right of the accommodation zone, farmland together with forest park was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
down to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
way for golf amenities and tennis courts. Down to the South, the traffic infrastructure did not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
despite all the new construction around. The hotel and the
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
still
remained at the same location as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
however
there was an introduction to the adjacent car park. Not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
far from this part of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
, restaurants
were replaced
by several shops while the demolition of the fish market led to recent apartment blocks.
Lastly
, the fishing port disappeared in the beach area.
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IELTS academic The 2 maps show the changes in a town over a 20-year period

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
165 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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