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Main reasons for migration to or from UK in 2007

Main reasons for migration to or from UK in 2007 dqQD7
The two pie charts illustrate major reasons why people came to and left the UK in 2007. Overall, people immigrated mostly for fixed occupation and formal education, while emigrated people principally looked for definite jobs. To begin with the two biggest purposes of immigration, the significant percentages of 30% of people who entered the UK for a definite job and emigration occupied a similar figure of 29%. People also went to this country for education. The proportion of formal study took up 1% more than a quarter and became the second highest reason that people move to the UK. However, the amount of people who left the UK for study accounted for 4%, the lowest rate among all reasons. Unlike these two mentioned causes, joining with family members affected the number of people entering the UK the same way as people who decided to leave. Regarding searching for a job, 12% of people came to the UK for this reason while a fifth decided to emigrate. People that have other reasons and none accounted for less than a fifth of immigration and 32% for emigration.
The two pie charts illustrate major
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reasons
why
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people
came to and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
the UK in 2007.
Overall
,
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people
immigrated
mostly
for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
occupation and formal education, while emigrated
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people
principally
looked for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
definite
jobs.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with the two biggest purposes of immigration, the significant percentages of 30% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who entered the UK for a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
definite
job and emigration occupied a similar figure of 29%.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
also
went to this country for education. The proportion of formal study took up 1% more than a quarter and became the second highest
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reason
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to the UK.
However
, the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
the UK for study accounted for 4%, the lowest rate among all reasons.

Unlike these two mentioned causes, joining with family members
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
entering the UK the same way as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who decided to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
. Regarding searching for a job, 12% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
came to the UK for this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
while a fifth decided to emigrate.
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People
that have other
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reasons
and none accounted for less than a fifth of immigration and 32% for emigration.
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IELTS academic Main reasons for migration to or from UK in 2007

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
185 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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