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Line graph summaries the information

Line graph summaries the information peO2d
The line graphs illustrates the percentages of different types of households with electrical appliances were owned by people in a country and the number of hours per week spent on house work from 1920 to 2019. Overall, all percentages of electrical appliances increased over the period given, while the amount of time spent on household work decreased from 1920 to 2019. In 1920, refrigerator was in zero percentage and then it gradually rose up to 100 in 1980 and remained the same until 2019. Likewise, 30% of vacuum cleaner was owned in 1920, which reached to 100% in 2000 and continued till 2019. furthermore, approximately 75% of people were owning washing mechine in 2019, which was at 40% in1920 then it steadily climbed up to 70% in 1960 after that faced a drop to 60% in 1980, and then again climbed dramatically to 75% in 2019. Numbers of hours spent on house works became very low from1920 to 2019. Compare to 1920 five times lesser time was spent on household works in 2019. there was a steep falling to 20 hours from 50 hours observed in between 1920 to 1960. thereafter it continued the same pattern with slight falling to reach 10 hours in 2019.
The line graphs illustrates the percentages of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of households with electrical appliances were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owned
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in a country and the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
per week
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from 1920 to 2019.

Overall
, all percentages of electrical appliances increased over the period
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
, while the amount of time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
on household
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
decreased from 1920 to 2019.

In 1920, refrigerator was in zero percentage and then it
gradually
rose up to 100 in 1980 and remained the same until 2019.
Likewise
, 30% of vacuum cleaner was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owned
in 1920, which reached to 100% in 2000 and continued till 2019.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
furthermore
, approximately 75% of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
The verb 'owning' is a stative verb and sometimes the progressive form is not correct. Try a simple form instead.
were owning
washing
Possible spelling mistake found.
mechine
in 2019, which was at 40% in1920 then it
steadily
climbed up to 70% in 1960 after that faced a drop to 60% in 1980, and then again climbed
dramatically
to 75% in 2019.

Numbers of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
works became
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
low from1920 to 2019. Compare to 1920 five times lesser time was
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
on household works in 2019.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
there
was a steep falling to 20
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
from 50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
observed in
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 1920 and 1960".
between 1920 to 1960
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
thereafter
it continued the same pattern with slight falling to reach 10
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
in 2019.
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IELTS academic Line graph summaries the information

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
205 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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