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It is more important to plant trees in open areas than building skyscrapers. Do you agree or not

It is more important to plant trees in open areas than building skyscrapers. Do you agree or not PkWpX
World beautiful with the nature and nature with the plants such as trees, flowers, grass and so on. L truly advocate the prospective which planting trees is more fundamental than constructing big buildings in open places. Now I am going to prove it below. The first and foremost factor to approve the statement is that nowadays the environment is getting worse and worse that is why we have got lots of surrounding issues and air pollution is also one of them. If we want to get rid of this problem we should plant lots of trees and trees aid to pure the air. Another leading point is that trees aid to improve the soils. If we plant lots of trees, trees leaves are spilled and it is natural fertilizer for the soils. We can grow vegetables and fruits that is why we can say trees supply our daily helpings. Afterwards, trees are really spectacular. Trees adds up buty everywhere when they blossom. For example when Japanese Sakura trees blossom, they seen really beautiful and tourists come to see them. Nevertheless there are some who contradic to that opinion, they think we need construct lots of buildings and that buildings provide us with a lot of amenities. They think about only their interests but no about nature. By the way of conclusion according to before mentioned points, people need to care for nature rather than concerning own interests.
World
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
with the nature and nature with the plants such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
, flowers, grass and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. L
truly
advocate the prospective which planting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
is more fundamental than constructing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
buildings in open places.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
I am going to prove it below.

The
first
and foremost factor to approve the statement is that nowadays the environment is getting worse and worse
that is
why we have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lots
of surrounding issues and air pollution is
also
one of them. If we want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
rid of this problem we should plant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lots
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
aid to pure the air.

Another leading point is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
aid to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the soils. If we plant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lots
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leaves
are spilled
and it is natural fertilizer for the soils. We can grow vegetables and fruits
that is
why we can say
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
supply our daily helpings.

Afterwards,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
are
really
spectacular.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Trees
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
adds
up
Possible spelling mistake found.
buty
everywhere when they blossom.
For example
when Japanese
Possible spelling mistake found.
Sakura
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trees
blossom, they
Possible grammatical error. You used a past participle without using any required verb ('be' or 'have'). Did you mean "saw"?
seen
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
and tourists
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
them.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Nevertheless
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
who
Possible spelling mistake found.
contradic
to that opinion, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
we need construct
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lots
of buildings and that buildings provide us with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of amenities. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
their interests
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
Did you mean "now" (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
no
about nature.

By the way of conclusion according to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
mentioned points,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
need to care for nature
rather
than concerning
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
interests.
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IELTS academic It is more important to plant trees in open areas than building skyscrapers. Do you agree or not

Academic
  American English
6 paragraphs
237 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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