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Employment sectors of graduates from Brighton University, 2019

Employment sectors of graduates from Brighton University, 2019 dwep
The chart represents the employment sectors of graduates from Brighton University, 2019. The most popular sector for the graduates is the service industry with 33 percent, and the least popular is sports with 0. 3 percent. The second most popular industry is manufacturing, followed by the education industry. Politics and government is placed close behind the education industry with 12. 1 percent. Some of the sectors with least graduates are the charity, science and technology, civil services and transportation and warehousing. All other industries combined make 5. 6 percents.
The chart represents the employment sectors of graduates from Brighton University, 2019. The most popular sector for the graduates is the service
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industry
with 33
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percent
, and the least popular is sports with 0. 3
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percent
. The second most popular
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industry
is manufacturing, followed by the education
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industry
. Politics and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
is placed
close behind the education
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industry
with 12. 1
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percent
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
of the sectors with
A determiner is probably missing here: "the least".
least
graduates are the charity, science and technology, civil services and transportation and warehousing. All other
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industries
combined
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make
5. 6
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percents
.
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IELTS academic Employment sectors of graduates from Brighton University, 2019

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
89 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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