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ages of population of Yemen and Italy in 2000 and 2050

ages of population of Yemen and Italy in 2000 and 2050 jo79N
The charts indicate the different ages of the habitants of Yemen and Italy in 2000 and also predict their populations for 2050 There is both increases and decreases in each group of the populations of both countries through fifty years in 2000. Half of the habitants of Yemen included children meanwhile in Italy, the biggest part of the community belonged to young and adult people. In 2000 the majority of Yemen’s people was children between 0 to 14 years old with 50. 1% and the other big part of It’s habitants belonged to people with 15 to 59 years old (46. 3%). Therefore older people (60+ years old) made the smallest part of Yemen’s community. The prediction about 2050 represents that there will be an increase in the number of both older people and younger ones (15-59 years old) as they include 5. 7% and 57. 3% of the population. On the other hand there will be a 13. 1% decrease in the number of children living in Yemen reaching to 37%. Italy’s population in 2000 was mostly made of people between 15 to 59 years old with 61. 6% and the portion for older people was 24. 1% which shows that Italy’s average age for it’s habitants was way more that Yemen’s. The predictions for 2050 shows that the preponderance of Italy’s community will still be made of young people (15-59 years old) despite experiencing a decrease until it reaches to 46. 2%. Also there will be an increase in the number of older people reaching to 42. 3% so that only 11. 5% of the community will include children. To conclude, both countries will experience a population aging until 2050 even though Italy’s number of older people will be eight times more than Yemen’s.
The charts indicate the
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different
ages of the habitants of Yemen and Italy in 2000 and
also
predict their
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populations
for 2050

Did you mean "There are both increases"?
There is both increases
and decreases in each group of the
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populations
of both countries through fifty years in 2000. Half of the habitants of Yemen included children meanwhile in Italy, the biggest part of the
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community
belonged to young and adult
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people
.

In 2000 the majority of Yemen’s
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people
was children
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 0 and 14".
between 0 to 14
years
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old
with 50. 1% and the other
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big
part
Did you mean "of its habitants"?
of It’s habitants
belonged to
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people
with 15 to 59 years
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old
(46. 3%).
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Therefore
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older
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people
(60+ years
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old)
made the smallest part of Yemen’s
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community
. The prediction about 2050 represents that there will be an increase in the
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number
of both
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older
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people
and younger ones (15-59 years
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old)
as they include 5. 7% and 57. 3% of the
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population
.
On the other hand
there will be a 13. 1% decrease in the
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number
of children living in Yemen reaching to 37%.

Italy’s
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population
in 2000 was
mostly
made of
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people
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 15 and 59".
between 15 to 59
years
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old
with 61. 6% and the portion for
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older
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people
was 24. 1% which
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shows
that Italy’s average age
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for it’s habitants
was way more that Yemen’s. The predictions for 2050
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shows
that the preponderance of Italy’s
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community
will
still
be made
of young
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people
(15-59 years
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old)
despite experiencing a decrease until it reaches to 46. 2%.
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Also
there will be an increase in the
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number
of
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older
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people
reaching to 42. 3%
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so
that
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only
11. 5% of the
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community
will include children.

To conclude
, both countries will experience a
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population
aging until 2050
even though
Italy’s
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number
of
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older
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people
will be eight times more than Yemen’s.
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IELTS academic ages of population of Yemen and Italy in 2000 and 2050

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
296 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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Lexical Resource: 5.0
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Grammatical Range: 6.0
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Task Achievement: 5.0
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