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Describe a story that was particularly interesting to you. v.1

Describe a story that was particularly interesting to you. v. 1
Describe a story that was particularly interesting to you. You should say: what it is about who told you this story when you heard this story and explain why this was an interesting story to you. [You will have to talk about the topic for one to two minutes. You have one minute to think about what you're going to say. You can make some notes to help you if you wish. ] Sample Answer 1: Every story is taken either from human experience or from human imagination and when a story is told, the audiences and readers try to connect it with their own experience or creative thinking. Thus each story is a great one and interesting if this is told to the right audiences in a right tone. An interesting story that I would like to talk about for this cue card topic is not taken from someone's imagination; rather it is taken from a real event. I heard this story from one of my uncles and he told me this story in my childhood and this is still an inspiring story for me. This is a story about a man who risked his life to save others from an imminent disaster or more accurately from death. It was 1995 and a massive hurricane stroke in the (. . . say the name of a suburban/ rural area. . . ). As soon as the hurricane hit, the disaster and destruction were everywhere. Many people died and many were injured. Yet many others were trapped in and needed to be rescued and hospitalised immediately. Though there were many rescue workers who were working ceaselessly, they did not have enough time to save all the trapped people. At that time a man named Thomas came forward and made a group of young people in order to arrange a rescue team. Thomas himself was more than 50 years old, yet he had been able to motivate 10-12 other young men of this area to help the trapped people within a very short time. They worked really hard for more than 24 hours and as I heard from my uncle, more than 30 people were rescued due to the brave initiative of Thomas. My uncle was one of the team members of this rescue team and every time he mentioned Thomas, I could feel a great respect in his voice. It was a great tragedy that Thomas lost his wife and only son in a devastating earthquake a few years later and left the area to settle in a different city. People of this area will always remember his bravery and great courage, at least for next few decades. I have read and heard many other interesting stories but Thomas and his team did something extraordinary and I will always remember how good people among us work selflessly to help others.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Describe
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
story
that was
particularly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interesting
to you. You should say: what it is about who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
told
you this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
story
when you heard this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
story
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
why this was an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interesting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
story
to you. [You will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
talk about the topic for one to two minutes. You have one minute to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about what you're going to say. You can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
notes to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you if you wish.
Loose punctuation mark.
]
Sample Answer 1:

Every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
story
is taken
either from human experience or from human imagination and when a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
story
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
told
, the audiences and readers try to connect it with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
experience or creative thinking.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
story
is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
one and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interesting
if this is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
told
to the
right
audiences in a
right
tone. An
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interesting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
story
that I would like to talk about for this cue card topic is not taken from someone's imagination;
rather
it
is taken
from a real
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
. I heard this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
story
from one of my
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
uncles and
he
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
told
me this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
story
in my childhood and this is
still
an inspiring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
story
for me.

This is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
story
about a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
who risked his life to save others from an imminent disaster or more
accurately
from death. It was 1995 and a massive hurricane stroke in the (.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
say
the name of a suburban/ rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Loose punctuation mark.
)
. As
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as the hurricane hit, the disaster and destruction were everywhere.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
died
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
were injured
.
Yet
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
others
were trapped
in and needed to
be rescued
and
Possible spelling mistake. 'hospitalised' is British English.
hospitalised
immediately. Though there were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
rescue workers who were working
ceaselessly
, they did not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time to save all the trapped
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. At that time a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
named Thomas came forward and made a group of young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in order to arrange a rescue
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
. Thomas himself was more than 50 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
,
yet
he had been able to motivate 10-12
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the trapped
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
within a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
short time.

They worked
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for more than 24 hours and as I heard from my uncle, more than 30
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
were rescued
due to the brave initiative of Thomas. My uncle was one of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
members of this rescue
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
and every time he mentioned Thomas, I could feel a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
respect in his voice. It was a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
tragedy that Thomas lost his wife and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
son in a devastating earthquake a few years later and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
to settle in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
city.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
will always remember his bravery and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
courage, at least for
next
few decades.

I have read and heard
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interesting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stories
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
Thomas and his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
did something extraordinary and I will always remember how
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
among us work
selflessly
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
others.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
43Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Mistakes
Language shapes the way we think, and determines what we can think about.
Benjamin Lee Whorf

IELTS speaking Describe a story that was particularly interesting to you. v. 1

Speaking
  American English
5 paragraphs
480 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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