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Describe a friend you had as a child/ teenager. v.1

Describe a friend you had as a child/ teenager. v. 1
Describe a friend you had as a child/ teenager. You should say: when and how you first met this friend what you liked to do together what you two had in common and explain why this friendship was important to you.   Model Answer 1: I have been lucky to have many friends, especially, when I was growing up as a teenager as well as when became an adult. While I always cherish the friendship of all of those friends, who I met, I would like to mention specifically about one of them who was a great friend of mine as a teenager. His name was Mesbah Bhatia, and I met him for the first time during a friendly football match between two local teams in our locality when I was still a high school student about 10 years ago. I think that his parents had just moved into our locality rather recently during that time, and he didn’t know too many people or friends to feel that he also belonged there. So, when we requested him to play for our team because one of our team members needed to leave the playground for some family reasons, he gladly agreed. Anyway, Mesbah was a friendly fellow, and later on, I also came to know that he was attending the same class as me, but he was going to a different high school. After playing a few football matches together, we soon became good friends of each other. Since we both were the same age, we both pretty much liked and cared for the same things. For example, he liked to ride his bicycle and so did I. Mesbah even liked to eat the same type of grilled fish like me. Of course, there were some significant differences between us also. For example, he was afraid of water but I wasn’t. Anyway, we liked to do a lot of things together, but we probably enjoyed watching action movies and shopping together the most. Anyway, this friendship was important to me as he would always encourage me to study harder. It was also important to me because I could trust him with anything. Finally, Mesbah was a helpful person, and he would never hesitate to help me with my homework, even when he was busy with his own.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Describe
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
you had as a child/
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
. You should say: when and how you
first
met this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
what you liked to do together what you two had in common and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
why this friendship was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to you.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
Model Answer 1:

I have been lucky to have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
,
especially
, when I was growing up as a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
as
well
as when became an adult. While I always cherish the friendship of all of those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
, who I met, I would like to mention
specifically
about one of them who was a great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
of mine as a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
.

His name was
Possible spelling mistake found.
Mesbah
Possible spelling mistake found.
Bhatia
, and I met him for the
first
time during a friendly football match between two local teams in our locality when I was
still
a high school student about 10 years ago.

I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that his parents had
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
into our locality
rather
recently during that time, and he didn’t know too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
to feel that he
also
belonged there.
So
, when we requested him to play for our team
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
one of our team members needed to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
the playground for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
family reasons, he
gladly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
.
Anyway
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Mesbah
was a friendly fellow, and later on, I
also
came to know that he was attending the same
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
as me,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
he was going to a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
high school. After playing a few football matches together, we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
became
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
of each other.

Since we both were the same age, we both pretty much liked and cared for the same things.
For example
, he liked to ride his bicycle and
so
did I.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Mesbah
even liked to eat the same type of grilled fish like me.
Of course
, there were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
significant differences between us
also
.
For example
, he was afraid of water
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I wasn’t.
Anyway
, we liked to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
things together,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we
probably
enjoyed watching action movies and shopping together the most.

Anyway
, this friendship was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to me as he would always encourage me to study harder. It was
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to me
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I could trust him with anything.
Finally
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Mesbah
was a helpful person, and he would never hesitate to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
me with my homework, even when he was busy with his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
.
15Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS speaking Describe a friend you had as a child/ teenager. v. 1

Speaking
  American English
6 paragraphs
386 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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