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Describe a famous person you would like to meet. v.2

Describe a famous person you would like to meet. v. 2
Describe a famous person you would like to meet. You should say: who this person is why you want to meet this person why this person is famous and explain what you would do if you meet him/her.   Model Answer 1: Since my early childhood, I have loved playing football. So, it was quite natural for me to always admire a great footballer. But, never had I had the urge to meet a famous footballer until I saw a magician with football called “Lionel Messi”. Yes, I would like to meet Lionel Messi. Not sure about others, but I consider him as one of the legendary footballers of modern times, if not of all times. Lionel Messi is an Argentine Footballer who started his football career at the age of 17 when he joined Barcelona club. Since then, he never really had the time to look back as he kept winning for his club and team season after season with his extraordinary football skills. His style of play, as a diminutive, left-footed dribbler, drew comparisons with his compatriot Diego Maradona, another football legend of all times, who described Messi as his successor. Anyway, in today’s world, there are a few very few football fans, who don’t know about Messi and his football skills, but many don’t know that he had to overcome some serious health issue, like hormone problem which made him grow way faster than other children of his age, in order to become one of the most successful footballers of modern times as well as the leading goal scorer of all times for his country, Argentina. Of course, Messi is a famous hero, not only because of his perseverance to overcome his physical deficiency and build his soccer skills but also for using it to spread joy around the world to many children who have a hard life. If I ever get a chance to meet this famous footballer, I would certainly ask for some autographs from him first. Then, of course, I would ask him as to what really motivated him to become such a great footballer apart from the reason of being born in a football-crazy country. Besides, I would also invite him to come to visit my country sometime and play there. Then, finally, I would wish him "best of luck" for his better future career.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Describe
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
you would like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
. You should say:
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
is why you want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
why this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
what you would do if you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
him/her.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
Model Answer 1:

Since my early childhood, I have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
.
So
, it was quite natural for me to always admire a great footballer.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, never had I had the urge to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
footballer until I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
a magician with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
called “Lionel Messi”.

Yes, I would like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
Lionel Messi. Not sure about others,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I consider him as one of the legendary footballers of modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
, if not of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
. Lionel Messi is an Argentine Footballer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
career at the age of 17 when he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
joined
Barcelona club. Since then, he never
really
had the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to look back as he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
winning for his club and team season after season with his extraordinary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. His style of play, as a diminutive,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
-footed dribbler, drew comparisons with his compatriot Diego
Possible spelling mistake found.
Maradona
, another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
legend of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
described
Messi as his successor.
Anyway
, in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s world, there are a few
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
fans,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
don’t know about Messi and his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
don’t know that he had to overcome
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
serious health issue, like hormone problem which made him grow way faster than other children of his age, in order to become one of the most successful footballers of modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
as
well
as the leading goal scorer of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
for his country, Argentina.

Of course
, Messi is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
hero, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of his perseverance to overcome his physical deficiency and build his soccer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
for using it to spread joy around the world to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
life.

If I ever
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
footballer, I would
certainly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ask for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
autographs from him
first
. Then,
of course
, I would ask him as to what
really
motivated him to become such a great footballer apart from the reason of
being born
in a football-crazy country.
Besides
, I would
also
invite him to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to visit my country sometime and play there. Then,
finally
, I would wish him
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
best of luck
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
for his better future career.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
27Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
The most intimate temper of a people, its deepest soul, is above all in its language.
Jules Michelet

IELTS speaking Describe a famous person you would like to meet. v. 2

Speaking
  American English
5 paragraphs
392 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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