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write about the affect of facebook on student' lives (150 words )

write about the affect of facebook on student' lives (150 words ) oxqDq
It is undeniable that Facebook is one of the most common entertaining tools however, there is numerous negative impact on individual student' lives. To begin with, Facebook controls our privacy directly. To some extent, students who are not aware of the danger of social networks, give the greatest amount of privacy to Facebook. That means your personal information will be lost easily. Moreover, Facebook plays a crucial role in controlling our relations in work and study, it is more and more extended. It is difficult to leave Facebook as a result of all their friends are there. Students tend to fasten their eyes on Facebook without thinking of its risk. To some research, students spend more a half of five hours a day suffering Internet. So it is clear that the more time you spend on it, your health will go down day after day. On the other hand, lots of detrimental contents are soaring remarkably. This might influence critically on students' thoughts and behaviors. In conclusion, Internet has numerous positive impacts but let be a smart user if you do not want to become entrapped with risky dangers.
It is undeniable that Facebook is one of the most common entertaining tools
however
, there is numerous
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on individual student'
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, Facebook controls our privacy
directly
. To
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent, students who are not aware of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
of social networks, give the greatest amount of privacy to Facebook. That means your personal information will
be lost
easily
.
Moreover
, Facebook plays a crucial role in controlling our relations in work and study, it is more and more extended. It is difficult to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
Facebook
as a result
of all their friends are there. Students tend to fasten their eyes on Facebook without thinking of its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
.

To
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
research, students spend more a half of five hours a day suffering Internet.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the more time you spend on it, your health will go down day after day.
On the other hand
, lots of detrimental contents are soaring
remarkably
. This might influence
critically
on students' thoughts and behaviors.

In conclusion
, Internet has numerous
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impacts
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
be a smart user if you do not want to become entrapped with risky
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
dangers
.
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IELTS essay write about the affect of facebook on student' lives (150 words )

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
189 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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