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To have the ability to get along well with people is vital in work places.

To have the ability to get along well with people is vital in work places. OVnAp
To have the ability to get along well with people is vital in work places. It relates to whether our bosses like us or our partners would help us. Hence, many people claims that letting students learn how to relate well to people is more important than study. Nevertheless, in my opinion, students should spend more time on studying in school. In the ensuing essay, my perspective will be substantiated by underlying reasons. First of all, the knowledge we acquire from school are the ability less people have. To take myself as an example, when I was a university student, I studied business management as my major at school. After I had a job, commerce which I learned from school become my specialization that only me in the office have the background knowledge, which then assisted me to be promoted faster than other colleagues who had worked there longer than me. However, most of the people in our company were good at relating well to people. To be more specific, relating well to people is an ability that is easier to acquire. It don’t need to take our four years to study full-time in a university but with shorter time. Secondly, studying hard in school is only in a short period in our life which we should cherish. After we graduate, we will have no opportunity to extent my study if I don't apply for a higher degree. For example, after I no longer were a student, it’s no chances for me to get a deeper knowledge of my major, business management. I have to use my spare time to read some related book but no teacher can offer me suggestion and lecture. I missed studying as a students sometimes, and even regretted on not study harder to acquire more knowledge from teachers. On the contrary, relating well to people is an ability we can learn through our whole life. It is a skill we can always learn from our friends, colleagues and clients. To sum up, I believe that students should spent most of their time on studying in school than learning on how to relate well to people.
To have the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ability
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
along
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
vital in work places. It relates to whether our bosses like us or our partners would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us.
Hence
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
claims
that letting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
learn how to relate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
.
Nevertheless
, in my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should spend more time on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. In the ensuing essay, my perspective will
be substantiated
by underlying reasons.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
we acquire from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
are the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ability
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have. To take myself as an example, when I was a university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
, I studied business management as my major at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. After I had a job, commerce which I learned from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
become my specialization that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
me in the office have the background
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
, which then assisted me to
be promoted
faster than other colleagues who had worked there longer than me.
However
, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at relating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. To be more specific, relating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ability
that is
easier to acquire. It
The pronoun 'It' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "doesn’t", "didn’t".
don’t
need to take our four years to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
full-time in a university
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
with shorter time.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in a short period in our life which we should cherish. After we graduate, we will have no opportunity to extent my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
if I don't apply for a higher degree.
For example
, after I no longer were a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
, it’s no chances for me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a deeper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
of my major, business management. I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
my spare time to read
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
related book
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
no teacher can offer me suggestion and lecture. I missed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
, and even regretted on not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
harder to acquire more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
from teachers.
On the contrary
, relating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ability
we can learn through our whole life. It is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
we can always learn from our friends, colleagues and clients.

To sum up, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should
The verb 'should' requires the base form of the verb: "spend"
spent
most of their time on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
than learning on how to relate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
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IELTS essay To have the ability to get along well with people is vital in work places.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
360 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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