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The number of people who are ar risk of health problems due to being overweight is increasing. What is the reason for the growth in overweight peope in society? How can this problem be solved?

The number of people who are ar risk of health problems due to being overweight is increasing. What is the reason for the growth in overweight peope in society? How can this problem be solved? GMMMe
It is claimed that increasing number of people are suffering from obesity which might cause acute health issues. There are several causes and solutions that will be elaborated on this essay. To begin with, there are few reasons due to which this issue becomes an alarming peril. Firstly, this is a result of consuming more calories than burning through physical activity which could lead to a sedentary lifestyle. In this case, people's desire to eat food could be boosted that they become more and more eager consuming processed food as they have a detrimental effect on health by intaking fast food, for example that is often tastier and less nutritious than whole foods and so promote overeating. Secondly, the reason why is there increased overweight individuals could be as a consequence of food advertising which encourages people to buy sugary drinks, high-fat snacks and other unhealthy foods. The clearest indication of this is due to the improved technological advancements that everyone has an access especially to internet in which they face numerous adverts every day, and it could be one of the vital factors that is discouraging people to consume healthy food through demonstrating various types of food to the public. Therefore, advertisements not only exist on the internet, but also on TV which are altering the way people think of foods. This surmountable issue can be tackled by few steps. First and foremost solution is avoding overeating and taking more exercise. In other words, taking up an outdoor sport or a physical activity like gardering or walking can compensate for a sedentary lifestyle. This can be done by attending gym courses. For example, In Uzbekistan more than 50% of people go to the gym in order to lose weight and control over their eating habits. Moreover, it improves appetite so that prevents sperating meal according to their taste. However, people who are free to choose a healthy diet and to take regular exercise which means it is our personal responsibility to maintain it. To illustrate, despite having instinctively which foods and activities are beneficial to health and which ones are detrimental, most of the people are not able to conform them. Last but not least, the public needs to be made aware of the health risks posed by engineered food. Since, as it has been mentioned that food advertising causes some problems and in this case, the state should provide people with relevant information about foods in order to increase the awareness of individuals. In a nutshell, it is only up to us whether or not we heed the advice given by health agencies and doctors. Certain factors exist which are the root of cause of this burgening issue in the society, however this can be ameliorated by collaborative steps by state and individuals.
It
is claimed
that increasing number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are suffering from obesity which might
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
acute
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
. There are several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
causes
and solutions that will
be elaborated
on this essay.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are few reasons due to which this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
becomes an alarming peril.
Firstly
, this is a result of consuming more calories than burning through physical activity which could lead to a sedentary lifestyle.
In this case
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's desire to eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
could
be boosted
that they become more and more eager consuming processed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
as they have a detrimental effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
by
Possible spelling mistake found.
intaking
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
,
for example
that is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
tastier and less nutritious than whole
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
promote overeating.
Secondly
, the reason why is there increased overweight individuals could be as a consequence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
advertising which encourages
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
sugary drinks, high-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
snacks and other unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
. The clearest indication of this is due to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
technological advancements that everyone has an access
especially
to internet in which they face numerous adverts every day, and it could be one of the vital factors
that is
discouraging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to consume healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
through demonstrating various types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
to the public.
Therefore
, advertisements not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
exist on the internet,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
on TV which are altering the way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
of foods.

This surmountable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
can
be tackled
by few steps.
First
and foremost solution is
Possible spelling mistake found.
avoding
overeating and taking more exercise.
In other words
, taking up an outdoor sport or a physical activity like
Possible spelling mistake found.
gardering
or walking can compensate for a sedentary lifestyle. This can
be done
by attending gym courses.
For example
, In Uzbekistan more than 50% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
go to the gym in order to lose weight and control over their eating habits.
Moreover
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
appetite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevents
Possible spelling mistake found.
sperating
meal according to their taste.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are free to choose a healthy diet and to take regular exercise which means it is our personal responsibility to maintain it. To illustrate, despite having instinctively which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
and activities are beneficial to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and which ones are detrimental, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not able to conform them. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, the public needs to
be made
aware of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
posed by engineered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. Since, as it has
been mentioned
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
advertising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
causes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
problems and
in this case
, the state should provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with relevant information about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
in order to increase the awareness of individuals.

In a nutshell, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
up to us
Consider shortening this phrase to just "whether". It is correct though if you mean 'regardless of whether'.
whether or not
we heed the advice
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
agencies and doctors. Certain factors exist which are the root of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
of this
Possible spelling mistake found.
burgening
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
in the society,
however
this can
be ameliorated
by collaborative steps by state and individuals.
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IELTS essay The number of people who are ar risk of health problems due to being overweight is increasing. What is the reason for the growth in overweight peope in society? How can this problem be solved?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
465 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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