Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Television advertising directed toward young children (aged two to five) should not be allowed. Do you agree or disagree with this idea? Explain it by giving specific examples.

Television advertising directed toward young children (aged two to five) should not be allowed. with this idea? Explain it by giving specific examples. QLnXx
It has debated that television advertising directed towards children should not be allowed by scientist. While some experts claim that it is harmful for children, others say that is has some advantages on children. Though both sides have pros and cons, I am in the opinion that television advertising toward children should be banned for several social, health related and entertainment based reasons. I will explain them with some specific examples in the following paragraphs. Firstly, watching advertisement has some negative social effects on children. The children who watch the television advertisements lost their interactions with their families or peers. This lack of socializing can cause a drop in the children’s school success. A research made in Sweden shows that children spend more time in front of television lost their contact abilities, whereas their peers who do not watch television advertisement have more interaction capacity. Besides, television advertisements offer dangerous products to children. If they see them so much, they want to buy them, and it can cause to have useless or harmful habits for children. Furthermore, television advertisements create health based effects on children. Not only children’s eyes can be effected badly, their capacity of intelligence can also decrease. An American research show us Otism in children is related to watching advertisements. Also, television advertisements generally offers to children unhealthy foods such as candies or fast foods. If children see them on televisions, they want to buy them. So their health can be effected negatively. Moreover, opponents of television advertising towards young children point outs that they are enjoyable activities for children. They claim that children can enjoy to watch colorful and dynamic advertisements. However, I am totally disagree with these ideas. Because the nature of children aged two to five requires being active, but watching television advertisement is completely passive activity. Thus, they can not enjoy while they are sitting in an armchair. Watching television advertisement has some social, health related and entertainment based disadvantages for children aged two to five. It causes less interaction with other people and create a desire to harmful products for children. It also effects children’s eyes, intelligence and whole health with dangerous products offered in advertisement. It makes children passive, so they can not enjoy with watching them, too.
It has debated that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
advertising directed towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should not be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
by scientist. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
experts claim that it is harmful for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, others say
that is
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advantages on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. Though both sides have pros and cons, I am in the opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
advertising toward
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should
be banned
for several social,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
related and entertainment based reasons. I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
them with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
specific examples in the following paragraphs.

Firstly
, watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
social effects on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
lost their interactions with their families or peers. This lack of socializing can cause a drop in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
school success.
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "research".
A research
made in Sweden
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
spend more time in front of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
lost their contact abilities, whereas their peers who do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
have more interaction capacity.
Besides
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
offer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
products to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. If they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much, they want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
them, and it can cause to have useless or harmful habits for children.

Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
create
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
based effects on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
eyes can
be effected
badly
, their capacity of intelligence can
also
decrease. An American research
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
us
Possible spelling mistake found.
Otism
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
is related
to watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
.
Also
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
generally
offers to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
unhealthy foods such as candies or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
foods. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
them on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
televisions
, they want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
them.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
can
be effected
negatively
.

Moreover
, opponents of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
advertising towards young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
point outs that they are enjoyable activities for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. They claim that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can enjoy to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
colorful and dynamic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
.
However
, I am
totally
Consider using a past participle here: "disagreed".
disagree
with these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
the nature of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
aged two to five requires being active,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
is completely passive activity.
Thus
, they can not enjoy while they are sitting in an armchair.

Watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
social,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
related and entertainment based disadvantages for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
aged two to five. It causes less interaction with other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and create a desire to harmful products for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. It
also
effects
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
eyes, intelligence and whole
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
products offered in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
passive,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can not enjoy with watching them, too.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Television advertising directed toward young children (aged two to five) should not be allowed. with this idea? Explain it by giving specific examples.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
377 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • Television advertising directed toward young children (aged two to five) should not be allowed. Do you agree or disagree with this idea? Explain it by giving specific examples.