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Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime.

Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime. 15LKn
The teachers play a major role in molding up the faculties of the child. Once the child got admitted to a school the teachers gave more impact on the child's social and mental growth than parents. Personally, I completely agree with the statement and this assay will explain why. First and foremost, the teachers taught the students what discipline is without which the person is like a rudderless ship which cannot sail to a destination but which lies at the mercy of the wind. It is because of good discipline a particular school or college gains fame and glory and parents want to admit their children in schools having such atmosphere. for example the child learns the basic manners from the teacher and adapt the speaking skills as well. like in India every parent wants their child to study in English medium school so that the child can grasp English speaking skill from very childhood. Moreover, nowadays the parents are much busier than before, to provide the best education and for better living they are engaged in two to three jobs, ultimately doesn't get sufficient time to spend with children. To exemplify, children nowadays at an early age are send to crèche or play way because their parents doesn't have enough time as both mother and father are doing nine to five jobs and no one is their to take care of their young ones. whilst the new crèche and play way are providing better facilities with advanced classes and good teachers. To conclude, I would say The teachers put the stepping stone of child's knowledge and it impacts the child's social, mental and physical behavior so the parents must be attentive before selecting a particular school or teacher for the child.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
play a major role in molding up the faculties of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
. Once the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
admitted to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
gave more impact on the child's social and mental growth than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
.
Personally
, I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the statement and this assay will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
why.

First
and foremost, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
taught the students what discipline is without which the person is like a rudderless ship which cannot sail to a destination
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
which lies at the mercy of the wind. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
discipline a particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
or college gains fame and glory and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
want to admit their children in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
having such atmosphere.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
for
example the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
learns the basic manners from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
and adapt the speaking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
as well
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
like
in India every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent
wants their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
to study in English medium
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
can grasp
Did you mean the adjective "English-speaking"?
English speaking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
childhood.

Moreover
, nowadays the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are much busier than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
, to provide the best education and for better living they
are engaged
in two to three jobs,
ultimately
doesn't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
sufficient time to spend with children. To exemplify, children nowadays at an early age are
Consider using a past participle here: "sent".
send
to crèche or play way
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
doesn't have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time as both mother and father are doing nine to five jobs and no one is their to take care of their young ones.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
whilst
the new crèche and play way are providing better facilities with advanced classes and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
teachers.

To conclude
, I would say The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
put the stepping stone of child's knowledge and it impacts the child's social, mental and physical behavior
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be attentive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
selecting a particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
.
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IELTS essay Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
292 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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