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Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of the society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.4

Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of the society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. v. 4
For the human being, learning is an essential requirement for the advancement of living standards as well as good manners which helps to raise social standards. There are two main resources for this, one is home and second is the academy where children spend their most of time in the learning phase of life. Some individual believes that parents are more responsible than teachers to teach children about how to become a good member of civilization while others give more importance to the institute. Both views would be discussed with their importance in the social advancement of a child. Firstly, the parents are one of the main and important sources of behavioural evolution of a boy or girl initial years of life. Mostly, from birth to joining the institute, most children spend most of the time with guardians and other family members. Most of the etiquettes like sympathy, love, good behaviour, customs and manners are taught by parents, which helps them to become responsible citizens of community. So, the role of parents and other family members are highly important for social improvement. Secondly, the department also plays a major role in other many life skills like politeness, group work, sharing resources with others, punctuality and discipline. Additionally, classroom teaching improves student’s listening, analytical and logical skills along with sharing of resources with friends and classmates. It is also One mail resource for learning about our culture, community and history, which helps them to be a good citizen. Along with this, academy also offers a platform for moral values. All in all, teachers and classmates at institute as well as parents and other guardians at home plays their Vital role in the progress of good members of company. As far as my opinion is concerned, I believe that both provide distinct learning platforms which are essential for all over progress of children.
For the human being,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
is an essential requirement for the advancement of living standards
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
manners which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to raise social standards. There are two main resources for this, one is home and second is the academy where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
spend their
Consider using "most time" or "most of the time".
most of time
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
phase of life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
individual believes that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are more responsible than teachers to teach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
about how to become a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
member
of civilization while others give more importance to the institute. Both views would
be discussed
with their importance in the social advancement of a child.

Firstly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are one of the main and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
sources of
Possible spelling mistake. 'behavioural' is British English.
behavioural
evolution of a boy or girl initial years of life.
Mostly
, from birth to joining the institute, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
spend most of the time with guardians and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
. Most of the
Possible spelling mistake found.
etiquettes
like sympathy,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
, customs and manners
are taught
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to become responsible citizens of community.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, the role of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
are
highly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for social improvement.

Secondly
, the department
also
plays a major role in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
like politeness, group work, sharing resources with others, punctuality and discipline.
Additionally
, classroom teaching
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
student’s listening, analytical and logical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
along with sharing of resources with friends and classmates. It is
also
One mail
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
resource
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
about our culture, community and history, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
citizen. Along with this, academy
also
offers a platform for moral values.

All in all, teachers and classmates at institute
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
guardians at home plays their Vital role in the progress of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
. As far as my opinion
is concerned
, I believe that both provide distinct
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
platforms which are essential for all over progress of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
27Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
Change your language and you change your thoughts.
Karl Albrecht

IELTS essay Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of the society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
311 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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