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Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The loss of natural habitats, in part due to intensive agriculture and industrial-scale mining in some parts of the world, as well as urbanisation, has put the survival of many species of plants and animals under threat. While this is certainly a major concern, is this the most pressing environmental problem that we should deal with? I certainly feel that humanity has a moral obligation to safeguard the survival of different species of fauna and flora. The loss of any species is permanent and means that future generations will not be able to appreciate the wonders of a diverse natural world. For example, the tragic extinction of the dodo is something which we still lament even today. Moreover, it can affect us detrimentally too. Many herbal remedies are derived from plants, and so the destruction of rainforests could easily have a negative effect on the production of medicinal drugs. In addition, we are part of a natural food chain, so the loss of animals, such as fish, means we will have less food in the future. Ultimately though, there is a far wider problem that needs to be addressed: global warming. As a result of emissions of greenhouse gases, such as CO2 and methane, global temperatures are rising and we risk seeing runaway heating. This will lead to a number of problems, including flooding, extreme weather and drought, but also the extinction of species. Indeed, polar bears are already struggling to survive because of the loss of polar ice caps due to rising temperatures. In other words, working to safeguard the survival of the natural world without tackling global warming would be entirely ineffective, so it’s not really a case of which one is more important: all environmental issues are ultimately interconnected, and so we need to take a holistic approach to the issue.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
loss
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
habitats, in part due to intensive agriculture and industrial-scale mining in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
parts of the world,
as well
as
Possible spelling mistake. ‘urbanisation’ is British English.
urbanisation
, has put the survival of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
species of plants and animals under threat. While this is
certainly
a major concern, is this the most pressing environmental problem that we should deal with?

I
certainly
feel that humanity has a moral obligation to safeguard the survival of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
species of fauna and flora. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
loss
of any species is permanent and means that future generations will not be able to appreciate the wonders of a diverse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
world.
For example
, the tragic extinction of the dodo is something which we
still
lament even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
.

Moreover
, it can affect us
detrimentally
too.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
herbal remedies
are derived
from plants, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the destruction of rainforests could
easily
have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect on the production of medicinal drugs.
In addition
, we are part of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
food chain,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
loss
of animals, such as fish, means we will have less food in the future.

Ultimately
though, there is a far wider problem that needs to
be addressed
: global warming.
As a result
of emissions of greenhouse gases, such as CO2 and methane, global temperatures are
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
rising and
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
seeing runaway heating. This will lead to a number of problems, including flooding, extreme weather and drought,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
the extinction of species.
Indeed
, polar bears are already struggling to survive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
loss
of polar ice caps due to rising temperatures.

In other words
, working to safeguard the survival of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
world without tackling global warming would be
entirely
ineffective,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it’s not
really
a case of which one is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
: all environmental issues are
ultimately
interconnected, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
we need to take a holistic approach to the issue.
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IELTS essay Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
304 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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