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Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. qVRDr
A common opinion is that free sport areas may contribute to level of public health, while others consider they will have no significant development and others methods and solutions should be realized. This essay will agree with necessity of other perspectives, by discussing benefits and drawbacks of both contrapositions. On the one hand, sport facilities play an essential role in improvement, due to the fact that activity is crucial part of healthy lifestyle. In other words, by constructing various playgrounds, courts, stadiums government stimulate citizens to move and spent time actively. Modern, multifunctional and free entertaining areas will attract numerous number of people and give more possibilities to stay fit without any extra expenditures, which will lead to the progress in health domain. For example, hundreds new basketball playgrounds were built in Kazakhstan, in 2019 in order to prevent growing of obesity among young generation. In results, more than 20000 teenagers start to play this game and were excluded from risk group. On the other hand, physical exercises are not only one component of healthy society. Myriad factors as mental development, diet, environmental conditions and medicine in general should be taken in consideration. To put in another way, the solution should cover all spheres in order to attain maximal benefits and increase public health in general, not only from one side. I think, the educational factor may accelerate the process and help people to come to awareness. For example, different lectures in schools, kindergartens, various types of training, media will be a way, which through citizens will have an access to all crucial information, like danger of fast-food or irreparable changes in organism. With understanding of damages and threats, people will become more rational and public health level will increase in natural way. To sum up, there are several opinions about sport facilities: while certain number of people confident in their effectivity, other argue that alter ways will have even larger impact to the public health. I fully support an idea, that another factors must be mentioned.
A common opinion is that free sport areas may contribute to level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
, while others consider they will have no significant development
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
methods and solutions should
be realized
. This essay will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with necessity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
perspectives, by discussing benefits and drawbacks of both
Possible spelling mistake found.
contrapositions
.

On the one hand, sport facilities play an essential role in improvement, due to the fact that activity is crucial part of healthy lifestyle. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, by constructing various playgrounds, courts, stadiums
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
stimulate citizens to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
and spent time
actively
. Modern, multifunctional and free entertaining areas will attract numerous number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and give more possibilities to stay fit without any extra expenditures, which will lead to the progress in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
domain.
For example
, hundreds new basketball playgrounds
were built
in Kazakhstan, in 2019 in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
growing of obesity among young generation. In results, more than 20000
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to play this game and
were excluded
from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
group.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, physical exercises are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one component of healthy society. Myriad factors as mental development, diet, environmental conditions and medicine
in general
should
be taken
in consideration. To put in another way, the solution should cover all spheres in order to attain maximal benefits and increase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
in general
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
from one side. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
, the educational factor may accelerate the process and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to awareness.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
lectures in schools, kindergartens, various types of training, media will be a way, which through citizens will have
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "access".
an access
to all crucial information, like
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-food or irreparable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in organism. With understanding of damages and threats,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will become more rational and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
level will increase in natural way.

To sum up, there are several opinions about sport facilities: while certain number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
confident in their effectivity,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
argue that alter ways will have even larger impact to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
. I
fully
support an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
, that another factors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be mentioned
.
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IELTS essay Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
337 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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