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Some people believe that smart phones are destroying social interaction today. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that smart phones are destroying social interaction today. XgPP
The use of smartphone is increasing in people's and it spoiling the social interaction between people and I am partially agree with this statement To embark on, the use of mobile phones destroyed the social interaction. Firstly, people prefer to share information with other with the help of smartphone rather than to do socially intract with them. Secondly, people can spend there leisure time on their phone and they can avoid social activities and outdoor activities. Last but not the least, smartphone destroy the the people's relationship with family and friends because they spend much time on using phone and give less attention to there friends and family. On the other hand, the use of smartphone is the easiest way to sharing information from one place to another place with the help of social media apps. For instance Facebook, Instagram, whatsap. Furthermore, people can easily intract with long distance people with the use of smartphone. In conclusion, every people use smartphone to intract with their friends and family instead this they avoiding the social interaction but they can easily talk with people from another country with phones.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of smartphone is increasing in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's and
Did you mean "it's spoiling", "it is spoiling", or "it was spoiling"?
it spoiling
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
interaction between
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
people and
I am
partially
Consider using a past participle here: "agreed".
agree
with this statement

To embark on, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
interaction.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to share information with other with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of smartphone
rather
than to do
socially
Possible spelling mistake found.
intract
with them.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can spend there leisure time on their
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
phone and
they can avoid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
activities and outdoor activities. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not the least, smartphone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "the" or "the" is left.
the the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's relationship with family and friends
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they spend much time on using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
and give less attention to
Did you mean "their"?
there
friends and family.

On the other hand
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of smartphone is the easiest way to sharing information from one place to another place with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
media apps.
For instance
Facebook, Instagram,
Possible spelling mistake found.
whatsap
.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
easily
Possible spelling mistake found.
intract
with long distance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of smartphone.

In conclusion
, every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
smartphone to
Possible spelling mistake found.
intract
with their friends and family
instead
this
Did you mean "they're avoiding", "they are avoiding", or "they were avoiding"?
they avoiding
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
interaction
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they can
easily
talk with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from another country with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
.

IELTS essay Some people believe that smart phones are destroying social interaction today.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
187 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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