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Some people believe that education is the key to tackling hunger worldwide while others feel that the answer is in food aid.

Many feel that education is the best way to tackle hunger while others feel that immediate food aid is a better solution. As far as I’m concerned, education is clearly the better long-term remedy. Many charities are active in food aid efforts because of its clear impact in emergency situations. A good example of this would be famines in a sub-Saharan African nations. These are caused by unpredictable weather conditions and coupled with governmental instability can result in mass malnutrition and even death. It is impossible to deal with the sources of these famines over time but food aid addresses its symptoms and keeps actual people alive now. The tangible results of this kind of aid are the strongest arguments in its favour. Although the above mentioned methods are appropriate in emergencies, they do little to disrupt the underlying causes of hunger. If people are better educated then they can get better jobs and hunger disappears as a problem. There may be other relevant economic realities, such as the unemployment rate, that need addressing but education will still go a long way to eradicating hunger. Education can also help in regions that are prone to hunger as farmers will be able to develop better agricultural methods. Simply put, if citizens have good jobs, there is little real threat of hunger even under exceptional circumstances. In conclusion, although food aid has its use, I feel education is a clearly better option. Governments ought to divert more resources into education to see world hunger ended over the course of the next century.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
feel that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is the best way to tackle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hunger
while others feel that immediate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aid
is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
solution. As far as I’m concerned,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is
clearly
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
long-term remedy.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
charities are active in
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food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aid
efforts
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
impact in emergency situations. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
example of this would be famines in
The plural noun “nations” cannot be used with the article “a”. Did you mean “a sub-Saharan African nation” or “sub-Saharan African nations”?
a sub-Saharan African nations
. These
are caused
by unpredictable weather conditions and coupled with governmental instability can result in mass malnutrition and even death. It is impossible to deal with the sources of these famines over time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aid
addresses its symptoms and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
actual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
alive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
. The tangible results of this kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aid
are the strongest arguments in its
Possible spelling mistake. ‘favour’ is British English.
favour
.

Although the above mentioned methods are appropriate in emergencies, they do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
to disrupt the underlying causes of
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hunger
. If
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
educated
Did you mean “than”?
then
they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
jobs and
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hunger
disappears as a problem. There may be other relevant economic realities, such as the unemployment rate, that need
Use a comma before ‘but’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
addressing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
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education
will
still
go a long way to eradicating
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hunger
.
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Education
can
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in regions that are prone to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hunger
as farmers will be able to develop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
agricultural methods.
Simply
put, if citizens have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
jobs, there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
real threat of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hunger
even under exceptional circumstances.

In conclusion
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aid
has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
, I feel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is a
clearly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
option.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Governments
ought to divert more resources into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hunger
ended over the course of the
next
century.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that education is the key to tackling hunger worldwide while others feel that the answer is in food aid.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
260 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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