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Some people argue that science is more important than arts. What is your opinion?

Some people argue that science is more important than arts. What is your opinion? VBPjw
Both science and arts have a played a vital role in human life since the evolution. However, some people believe that science has more importance as compared to arts in the life. This essay will discuss why science has a better role in human life in comparision to arts. To begin with, development in techonology is because of science. With the advancement of technology, there has been significant improvement in the standard of living of people. For example, air conditioned has tremendously made life easier in hotter parts of the world and same goes for the heater in colder regions. Therefore, improvement in technology has been beneficial to mankind. On the other hand, arts can mostly improve the personality of a person. Arts help to grow the imagination of a person in particular but in general it does not bring relief in peoples life as is the case with science. For instance, general people may find a beautiful painting as amusing and in the case of painter it will display his imaginations only, which may not improve the standard of life for people. Hence, arts is not as beneficial as science. In conclusion, science can elevate the standard of living of people but arts can only ameliorate the skills of a person in particular. In my opinion, science has a wider role in peoples life than arts, making it more important than science.
Both
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science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
have a played a vital role in human
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life
since the evolution.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
has more importance as compared to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. This essay will discuss why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
has a better role in human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
in
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comparision
to arts.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, development in
Possible spelling mistake found.
techonology
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
. With the advancement of technology, there has been significant improvement in the standard of living of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For example
,
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
air conditioned
has
tremendously
made
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
easier in hotter parts of the world and same goes for the heater in colder regions.
Therefore
, improvement in technology has been beneficial to mankind.

On the other hand
,
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arts
can
mostly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the personality of a person.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Arts
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to grow the imagination of a person
in particular
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in general
it does not bring relief in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peoples
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
as is the case with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
.
For instance
, general
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people
may find a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
painting as amusing and in the case of painter it will display his imaginations
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
, which may not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the standard of
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life
for
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people
.
Hence
,
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arts
is not as beneficial as science.

In conclusion
,
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science
can elevate the standard of living of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
ameliorate the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
of a person
in particular
. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
has a wider role in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peoples
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
, making it more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
.
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IELTS essay Some people argue that science is more important than arts. What is your opinion?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
233 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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