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Should high schools provide student specialized knowledge of a certain subject, or a variety of knowledge?

There is a long-term debate between the "depth" and "width" of systematic study in regard of students. This debate can be originated from the question: what is more beneficial to students' academic and future carrier achievement? In my perspective, it is unreasonable to target at intensifying a certain academic field before the acquisition of an extensive range of knowledge. How can a student possibly know his interested field of study before establishing a myriad of knowledge framework? A student can only decide his intensive study of a certain subject after receiving an extensive variety of courses. These courses are the foundation for the students' further pursuant.  America does an extremely good job in both providing the "depth" and "width" of education in a chronological order. In the American high schools, the curriculum are designed to provide as extensive framework of courses as possible. Thus, students would have a "taste" of each academic area, either Science or Arts. During this process, students can identify the area they are personally interested, such as geography, mathematics, or design. Then when these students enter university, they will have a chance to choose their specific fields which they are fond of according to their preferences. In this ambience, both the "width" and the interested "depth" can be achieved. Besides, acquiring a spectrum of knowledge before intensifying into a certain subject also has profound implications for a certain student's future career path. Nowadays, the construction of a sophisticated knowledge framework is still significant.  However, the importance of a wide range of academic knowledge is also surging. In a certain industry, an employee has to cope with problem simultaneously related to many different areas. For example, an employee in the art auction house should not just be savvy in aesthetics and the evaluation  of a masterpiece, but also in the principle of accounting and financial management. This tendency is attributed  to the integration and cohesion of different industries in the modern world. Thus, it is advantageous for every student to first acquire an array of knowledge and then construct an adept knowledge framework. Thus, constructing a wide range of knowledge before achieving the "depth" helps students to identify their interested areas. Also, this is conducive to their future careers by putting the students in a pre-emptive position.
There is a long-term debate between the 
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"
depth
Use a smart closing quote here.
"
and
Use a smart opening quote here.
"
width
Use a smart closing quote here.
"
 of systematic study in regard of students. This debate can
be originated
from the question:
what is more
beneficial to students'
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
and future carrier achievement? In my perspective, it is unreasonable to target at intensifying a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
field
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
the acquisition of an extensive range of knowledge.

How can a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
possibly
know his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interested
field of study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
establishing a

myriad of knowledge framework? A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
decide his intensive study of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
subject after receiving an extensive variety of courses. These courses are the foundation for the students'
further
pursuant.  America does an
extremely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
job in both providing the
Use a smart opening quote here.
"
depth
Use a smart closing quote here.
"
and
Use a smart opening quote here.
"
width
Use a smart closing quote here.
"
of education in a chronological order. In the American high schools, the curriculum
are designed
to provide as extensive framework of courses as possible.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
would have a
Use a smart opening quote here.
"
taste
Use a smart closing quote here.
"
of each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
, either Science or Arts. During this process,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can identify the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
they are
personally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interested
, such as geography, mathematics, or design. Then when these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
enter university, they will have a chance to choose their specific fields which they are fond of according to their preferences. In this ambience, both the
Use a smart opening quote here.
"
width
Use a smart closing quote here.
"
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interested
Use a smart opening quote here.
"
depth
Use a smart closing quote here.
"
can
be achieved
.

Besides
, acquiring a spectrum of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
intensifying into a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
subject
also
has profound implications for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
student's future career path. Nowadays, the construction of a sophisticated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
framework is
still
significant.  
However
, the importance of a wide range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
is
also
surging. In a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
industry, an employee
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
cope with problem
simultaneously
related to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
.
For example
, an employee in the art auction
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
should not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
be savvy in aesthetics and the evaluation
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
of a masterpiece,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
in the principle of accounting and financial management. This tendency
is attributed
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
to the integration and cohesion of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
industries in the modern world.
Thus
, it is advantageous for every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
to
first
acquire an array of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
and then construct an adept
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
framework.

Thus
, constructing a wide range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
achieving the
Use a smart opening quote here.
"
depth
Use a smart closing quote here.
"
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to identify their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interested
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
.
Also
, this is conducive to their future careers by putting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in a
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pre-emptive
 position.
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IELTS essay Should high schools provide student specialized knowledge of a certain subject, or a variety of knowledge?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
365 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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