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should elderly live with their families or stay in specific palces?

should elderly live with their families or stay in specific palces? JokyB
Nowadays, old aged people living with their own families or living in special communities have become one of the trending and noteworthy topics. Some people think they should be with their children and some people believe that they should be living in special accommodations which are existed for them. There are various reasons behind these opinions. In my opinion, it is more suitable and better for elderly people to live with their own children as far as their children can afford a healthy and comfortable atmosphere for them. When elderly people live in their homes with their own families, makes them think they are still part of their family and also makes them believe they are still important and adored for their children and grandchildren. Living in a nursing home can lead to feelings of loneliness and they may think they might have left behind. Besides the fact that there is nothing more important than a family in the world and children will take a better care of their old parents, such caring which is filled with true love and respect. However, some people think since elderly people require much caring and needs, they receive much helpful and proper care and attention in there. Also, these days due to all economic pressures almost every member of a family must work and make a living. Hence, this problem can cause younger members of the family some problem. For instance, because of all work pressure they are often too busy, nervous and also they have no enough time to spend time with their old parents and they may not be able to take good care of their old parents, especially the ones who have serious illnesses. In conclusion, if young and adult people have enough time and can afford elderly people a nice and convenient place for them to live I think that's the best choice to keep them living with us and make up all the hard works they have been through with for us.
Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
aged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in special communities have become one of the trending and noteworthy topics.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
they should be with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that they should be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in special accommodations which
are existed
for them. There are various reasons behind these opinions. In my opinion, it is more suitable and better for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
as far as their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can afford a healthy and comfortable atmosphere for them.

When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in their homes with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
they are
still
part of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
them believe they are
still
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and adored for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and grandchildren.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Living
in a nursing home can lead to feelings of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
loneliness and
they may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
they might have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
behind.
Besides
the fact that there is nothing more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
in the world and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will take a better care of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
parents, such caring which
is filled
with true
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
and respect.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
require much caring and needs, they receive much helpful and proper care and attention in there.
Also
, these days due to all economic pressures almost every member of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
work and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
.
Hence
, this problem can cause younger members of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
problem.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of all work pressure they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
too busy, nervous and
also
they have no
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time to spend time with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
parents and
they may not be able to take
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
care of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
parents,
especially
the ones who have serious illnesses.

In conclusion
, if young and adult
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time and can afford
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
a nice and convenient place for them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that's the best choice to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
with us and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
up all the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
works they have been through with for us.
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IELTS essay should elderly live with their families or stay in specific palces?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
334 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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