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People say that a child success is dependent on the way parents bring them up. Do you agree or disagree.

Undoubtedly, family plays an imperative role in success of the adolescent. Some folks opine that parents are the only who are responsible in the upbringing of the infants. I do not accord with the argument that mother and father contributes for the child's success. To begin with, there is no doubt that parents act as guardian of their children. They are the one who put their time and effort in the upbringing of the kids. Moreover, they provide them shelter, money, food and pay fees for the education when they are growing up. However, parents work for their infants for the long hours so they are able to provide them all facilities. Apart, from that mother and father keep eye on the kids so that they will not involve in bad activities and groups. In contrast, there are some other factors such as schooling, good teachers and friends. It is extremely significant that children should take education from better schools. Furthermore, in the school teachers and staff take care of them. Staff should give feedback to parents about kids performance. Also, they call regular teacher parents meeting. In particular, the friend circle is also important in the success of the child. Good parents and teachers always take care about the child's peers. Finally, parents need to monitor what type of programs their are watching. In conclusion, parenting is the most essential role one face in lifetime. Some other people like teacher, media and friends are helpful for the children success in life.
Undoubtedly
, family plays an imperative role in success of the adolescent.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
folks opine that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
who are responsible in the upbringing of the infants. I do not accord with the argument that mother and father contributes for the child's success.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there is no doubt that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
act as guardian of their children. They are the one who put their time and effort in the upbringing of the kids.
Moreover
, they provide them shelter, money, food and pay fees for the education when they are growing up.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
work for their infants for the long hours
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they are able to provide them all facilities. Apart, from that mother and father
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
eye on the kids
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they will not involve in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
activities and groups.

In contrast
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
other factors such as schooling,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
and friends. It is
extremely
significant that children should take education from better schools.
Furthermore
, in the school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
and staff take care of them. Staff should give feedback to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
about kids performance.
Also
, they call regular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
meeting.
In particular
, the friend circle is
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
in the success of the child.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
always take care about the child's peers.
Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
need to monitor what type of programs
Did you mean "there"?
their
are watching.

In conclusion
, parenting is the most essential role one face in lifetime.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
, media and friends are helpful for the children success in life.
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IELTS essay People say that a child success is dependent on the way parents bring them up.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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