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Parents are held responsible for their children’s acts, what is your opinion?

Parents are held responsible for their children’s acts, what is your opinion? 562dB
though such topics, in all likelihood, will never yield a consensual agreement, a constructive dialogue on the heated debate whether the parents are responsible for their children’s behavior or not can lead to a thought-provoking discussion. In my view, I argue that the children's behavior shall not be accounted by their children because of existence of other external aspects that may affect the children's behavior, and I will put my forth in this essay. To commence with, children are negatively affected by the behavior of their peers in the schools, which in most of the cases will negatively affect the behavior children. Moreover, it is vital to note that children in the schools are encouraging each other to be rowdy boys for presenting domination. For instance, a study shows that about 65% of children bad behavior are copied from their peers from school. Thus, it is crucial to note that the parents should not fully responsible for their children behavior. In the same context, most children nowadays are taking the sport team members and actors as solid example to follow. It is important to note that most of the sport team members and actors are having bad habits just like smoking, which is followed by children. Therefore, it is pivotal to observe what children watch. In conclusion, I see equally potential evidence that support my arguments i have provided above. In my point of view, I believe that there are many aspects that may affect on the children behavior, which are the behavior of other children in the school and the bad habits of the sport team members and actors.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
though
such topics, in all likelihood, will never yield a consensual agreement, a constructive dialogue on the heated debate whether the parents are responsible for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behavior
or not can lead to a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
-provoking discussion. In my view, I argue that the children's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behavior
shall not
be accounted
by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of existence of other external aspects that may affect the children's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behavior
, and I will put my forth in this essay.

To commence with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are
negatively
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behavior
of their peers in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
, which in most of the cases will
negatively
affect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behavior
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Moreover
, it is vital to note that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
are encouraging each other to be rowdy boys for presenting domination.
For instance
, a study
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that about 65% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behavior
are copied
from their peers from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
Thus
, it is crucial to note that the parents should not
fully
responsible for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
behavior.

In the same context, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
nowadays are taking the sport team members and actors as solid example to follow. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to note that most of the sport team members and actors are having
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
habits
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
like smoking, which
is followed
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Therefore
, it is pivotal to observe what
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
.

In conclusion
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
equally
potential evidence that support my arguments
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
have provided above. In my point of view, I believe that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
aspects that may
Did you mean "effect"?
affect
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behavior
, which are the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behavior
of other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
habits of the sport team members and actors.
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IELTS essay Parents are held responsible for their children’s acts, what is your opinion?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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