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Obesity is now a major global epidemic. What can be done to tackle this increasingly common problem?

Obesity is now a major global epidemic. What can be done to tackle this increasingly common problem? GmPo
Nowadays, obesity is rising rapidly and has become a global issue. That may put people's health at risk. This essay will first look into the threat and then give some feasible measures. Obesity is an over-increased weight. That may come from unreasonable lifestyles such as unhealthy diets and late bedtimes. When the calories absorbed from the food are not consumed, they become excessive and turn into fat. For a long time, this will cause obesity. Staying up late has the same effect because it disturbs the body function on systems. The ineffective work of body systems can accumulate fat and cause overweight. Obesity has some effects on people's health. It brings the feeling of heaviness and also causes some health problems. For example, obese people easily catch diseases related to the heart and kidney, typically heart attack, blood cholesterol, diabetes, high blood pressure, etc. Moreover, obese people have shorter longevity than others who aren't overweight. In reality, there are several practical solutions to reduce their chances of getting obese. A healthy and balanced diet is necessary to avoid obesity. A healthy diet helps people have enough energy to work without tiring. Besides that, people should do exercise to consume excess calories and keep in shape. That also makes people happier and more confident when going out. The government can introduce legislation restricting the promotion of unhealthy food to people and launch some kinds of 'stay active' health campaigns. Overall, obesity is a major global epidemic and causes many health problems, but it still has remedies. Keeping a good lifestyle makes people love life more and live longer.
Nowadays, obesity is rising
rapidly
and has become a global issue. That may put
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
. This essay will
first
look into the threat and then give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
feasible measures.

Obesity is an over-increased weight. That may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from unreasonable lifestyles such as unhealthy diets and late bedtimes. When the calories absorbed from the food are not consumed, they become excessive and turn into
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
. For a long time, this will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
obesity. Staying up late has the same effect
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it disturbs the body function on systems. The ineffective work of body systems can accumulate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
overweight.

Obesity has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
effects on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
. It brings the feeling of heaviness and
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
causes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
problems.
For example
, obese
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
easily
catch diseases related to the heart and kidney,
typically
heart attack, blood cholesterol, diabetes, high blood pressure, etc.
Moreover
, obese
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have shorter longevity than others who aren't overweight.

In reality, there are several practical solutions to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
their chances of getting obese. A healthy and balanced diet is necessary to avoid obesity. A healthy diet
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
energy to work without tiring.
Besides
that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should do exercise to consume excess calories and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
in shape. That
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
happier and more confident when going out. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
can introduce legislation restricting the promotion of unhealthy food to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and launch
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
kinds of 'stay active'
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
campaigns.

Overall
, obesity is a major global epidemic and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
causes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
problems,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
still
has remedies. Keeping a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
lifestyle
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
life more and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
longer.
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IELTS essay Obesity is now a major global epidemic. What can be done to tackle this increasingly common problem?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
267 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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