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Nowadays most parents put a lot of pressure on their children to succeed. what are the reasons for parents to do this? does it have a positive or negative effect on children in general?

Nowadays most parents put a lot of pressure on their children to succeed. what are the reasons for parents to do this? does it have a positive or negative effect on children in general? MMw79
With the Development Of world, There is no doubt that Our way of living Has completely changed. However, This change is now Receiving drawback From more and more people, especially from Children. They are pushed in Hardly to Fulfill Their parents Expectations. This essay will discuss Some reason why Parents Do this As well as It’s negative effects. On the one hand, There are numerous causes due to which parents Pressurize their children. Firstly, Parents appose a lot of expectations From their children which result As a burden For them. These days, Achieving success Is a competition In itself. The life Without success Is considered to be a ship without a sailor. Also, Apart from parental pressure there is also peer pressures. Take Vietnam As an example, where students Have to take Extra classes To meet the Competition. This can be Really exhausted For them To take Evening classes After a Tiring day At school. On the other hand, this trend Puts Many negative Effects. Such as, those students Who do not spend Enough time In extracurricular Activities, Face health issues. Mostly these include: obesity, Diabetes And heart diseases. In addition, They can be physically Weak As compared to their Counterparts. Moreover, The success path Defined by parents Do not always work for children. Alternatively, they can Surely be Successful If they Maximize their Performance In their own talent And interest. In conclusion, Every parent Want their children To be successful, Therefore, They push them to Work hard Because they have associated Lot of expectation From their them. In result, children Often Could not follow their talent and hence do not Achieve Maximum success. Also, They face Physical weakness And many health problems By not taking part in extracurricular activity. In my opinion, Children should be given free hand to choose their career.
With the Development Of world, There is no doubt that Our way of living Has completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
.
However
, This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
Receiving drawback From more and more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
especially
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
. They
are pushed
in Hardly to Fulfill Their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
Expectations. This essay will discuss
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
reason why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
Do this
As well
as It’s
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects.

On the one hand, There are numerous causes due to which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
Pressurize their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
appose
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
expectations From their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
which result As a burden For them. These days, Achieving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
Is a competition In itself. The life Without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
Is considered
to be a ship without a sailor.
Also
, Apart from parental pressure there is
also
peer pressures. Take Vietnam As an example, where students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Have to
take Extra classes To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the Competition. This can be
Really
exhausted For them To take Evening classes After a Tiring day At school.

On the other hand
, this trend Puts
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
Effects. Such as, those students Who do not spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Enough
time In extracurricular Activities, Face health issues.
Mostly
these include: obesity, Diabetes And heart diseases.
In addition
, They can be
physically
Weak As compared to their Counterparts.
Moreover
, The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
path Defined by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
Do not always work for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Alternatively
, they can
Surely
be Successful If they Maximize their Performance In their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
talent And interest.

In conclusion
, Every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent
Want their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
To be successful,
Therefore
, They push them to Work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
they have associated
It seems that an article is missing.
Lot of
expectation From their them. In result,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Often
Could not follow their talent and
hence
do not Achieve Maximum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
.
Also
, They face Physical weakness And
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
health problems By not taking part in extracurricular activity. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
free hand to choose their career.
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IELTS essay Nowadays most parents put a lot of pressure on their children to succeed. what are the reasons for parents to do this? does it have a positive or negative effect on children in general?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
303 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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