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My family and who is influencing us in our family and why?

My family and who is influencing us in our family and why? 0AOkQ
My family consist of 4 members, father mother elder brother and me. We are a small happy family. My father had a small busimess in my home town which got shut foen recently due to covid. My mother is hose wife but she take care of our garden. My brother is working in kochin as content manager. My most inpiring person from my fanily is my mother. She is really great mother, wife and a human being. Rven she is a house wife, she knows how to be taken care of a family by wealth and health. Shhe likes farming and we have a small garden for farming where she has planted many organic vegetables. And the best part is we never buy vegetables from outside because almost vegrtables we have in our home. And she sells too. She is a great support to my father when he couldn't earn at times. My brother has studied engineering but he couldnot complete the course.
My family consist of 4 members, father
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
elder brother and me. We are a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
happy family. My father had a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
Possible spelling mistake found.
busimess
in my home town which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
shut
Possible spelling mistake found.
foen
recently due to
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
covid
. My
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
is hose wife
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
she
The pronoun 'she' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "takes", "took".
take
care of our garden.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
My
brother is working in
Possible spelling mistake found.
kochin
as content manager.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
My
most
Possible spelling mistake found.
inpiring
person from my
Possible spelling mistake found.
fanily
is my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
. She is
really
great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
, wife and a human being.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Rven
she is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
wife, she knows how to
be taken
care of a family by wealth and health.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Shhe
likes
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
farming and
we have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
garden for farming where she has planted
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
organic vegetables. And the best part is we never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
vegetables from outside
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
almost
Possible spelling mistake found.
vegrtables
we have in our home. And she sells too. She is a great support to my father when he couldn't earn at times. My brother has studied engineering
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
he
Possible spelling mistake found.
couldnot
complete the course.
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IELTS essay My family and who is influencing us in our family and why?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
163 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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