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More students are travelling abroad for further education. Do you believe the advantages of this experience are greater than the drawbacks associated with it?

More students are travelling abroad for further education. Do you believe the advantages of this experience are greater than the drawbacks associated with it? aoe7

There have been an increasing number of students travelling internationally for further education in recent years. Whereas some people argue that studying abroad is a very positive experience, others suggest that there are several problems associated for it. I believe that the advantages of a study-abroad experience outweigh the drawbacks. In this example, the candidate writes a more developed introduction and offers a reference to the pros and cons of studying abroad. Apart from one preposition error, the use of complex grammar and tense are accurate. The writer uses a linking word of contrast (Whereas) to introduce an adverbial clause appropriately. Moreover, the paragraph is coherent and there is a wide variety of language. This type of writing merits a score of 8.

There have been an increasing number of students travelling internationally
 for further
 education in recent years. Whereas This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
 argue that studying abroad is a This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:extremelyimmenselysupremelysuperb
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:beneficial
positive
 experience, others suggest that there are several problems associated for it. I believe that the advantages of a study-abroad experience outweigh the drawbacks.

In this example, the candidate writes a more developed introduction and offers a reference to the pros and cons of studying abroad.

Apart from one preposition error, the This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :exploit
use
 of complex grammar and tense are accurate.

The writer This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :exploits
uses
 a linking word of contrast (Whereas) to introduce an adverbial clause appropriately
.

Moreover
, the paragraph is coherent and there is a wide variety of language. This type of writing merits a score of 8. 