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Mayor Brown was recently re elected by a clear majority of 52 percent of Monroetown s voters Her re election however does not show that most people in our town favored Mayor Brown s proposal for tax reduction over that of her opponent Mr Greene who propos

Mayor Brown was recently re elected by a clear majority of 52 percent of Monroetown s voters Her re election however does not show that most people in our town favored Mayor Brown s proposal for tax reduction over that of her opponent Mr Greene who propos BJQ86
The author of this editorial concludes that most Monroetown residents favor Greene's proposal to raise taxes in order to improve education over Brown's proposal to cut taxes, even though Brown defeated Greene by way of a majority vote in a recent mayoral election. To support this conclusion, the author points out to a nationwide tendency to re-elect people already elected previously regardless of their positions. The author also talks about a survey taken after the election that showed most Monroetown residents oppose Brown's proposal. As the following discussion shows, the author's argument is not supported by compelling evidences. Firstly, raising taxes does not assert that the quality of education will improve in the town. Maybe, the mayor's proposal for reducing taxes does not affect education in any way. There are many other ways to improve education in the town like hiring experienced teachers, motivating students to become more engrossed towards studies any many other ways. Raising taxes as proposed by the opposition, Mr Greene cannot be the only solution to it. Furthermore, the author unfairly assumes that the nationwide tendency applies specifically to Monroetown residents. Nationwide voters cannot be directly compared to Monroetown residents. Without any evidence that Monroetown residents reflect general nationwide tendency, it is entirely possible that Monroetown residents vote strictly according to their position on the issues. Additionally, the author fails to indicate how much time passed between the election and the survey showing that most Monroetown residents oppose her proposal. If the survey was conducted immediately after the elections, the fact that the survey contradicted the elections would cast severe doubts against the ruling Brown's party. However, in my opinion the survey was conducted long after the elections which may have caused people to change their opinions about the ruling party over time. Finally, the author talking about the people not voting Mr Greene inspite of approving his proposals about improving education seems absurd. The author's claim of people opposing Brown's proposal and in favor of the proposals set forth by Greene is unconvicing. To strenghten the argument the author must provide clear evidence that Monroetown residents voted contrary to their own positions on the issues when they re-elected Brown. To sum it up, in my opinion the author's claims lies on frail surveys that do not provide powerful evidences to support the claims. To bolster his claims, he must bring in more evidences that support it.
The
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author
of this editorial concludes that most
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Monroetown
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residents
favor Greene's
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proposal
to raise
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taxes
in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
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education
over Brown's
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proposal
to
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cut
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taxes
,
even though
Brown defeated Greene by
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way
of a majority vote in a recent mayoral
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election
. To support this conclusion, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author
points out to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nationwide
tendency to re-elect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
already elected previously regardless of their positions. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author
also
talks about a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
survey
taken after the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
election
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
most
Possible spelling mistake found.
Monroetown
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residents
oppose Brown's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proposal
. As the following discussion
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
, the author's argument is not supported by compelling evidences.

Firstly
, raising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
does not assert that the quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
in the town. Maybe, the mayor's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proposal
for reducing
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taxes
does not affect
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education
in any
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way
. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
in the town like hiring experienced teachers, motivating students to become more engrossed towards studies any
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
. Raising
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taxes
as proposed by the opposition, Mr Greene cannot be the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
solution to it.

Furthermore
, the
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author
unfairly
assumes that the
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nationwide
tendency applies
specifically
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
Monroetown
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
residents
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Nationwide
voters cannot be
directly
compared to
Possible spelling mistake found.
Monroetown
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
residents
. Without any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
evidence
that
Possible spelling mistake found.
Monroetown
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residents
reflect general
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nationwide
tendency, it is
entirely
possible that
Possible spelling mistake found.
Monroetown
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
residents
vote
strictly
according to their position on the issues.
Additionally
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
author
fails to indicate how much time passed between the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
election
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
survey
showing that most
Possible spelling mistake found.
Monroetown
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residents
oppose her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proposal
. If the
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survey
was conducted
immediately after the
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elections
, the fact that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
survey
contradicted the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elections
would cast severe doubts against the ruling Brown's party.
However
, in my opinion the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
survey
was conducted
long after the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elections
which may have caused
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their opinions about the ruling party over time.

Finally
, the
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author
talking about the
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people
not voting Mr Greene
Possible spelling mistake found.
inspite
of approving his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proposals
about improving
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education
seems absurd. The author's
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claim
of
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people
opposing Brown's
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proposal
and in favor of the
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proposals
set forth by Greene is
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unconvicing
. To
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strenghten
the argument the
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author
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
provide
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
evidence
that
Possible spelling mistake found.
Monroetown
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residents
voted contrary to their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
positions on the issues when they re-elected Brown. To sum it up, in my opinion the author's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
claims
lies on frail
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
surveys
that do not provide powerful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
evidences
to support the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
claims
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
To
bolster his
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claims
, he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
bring in more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
evidences
that support it.
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IELTS essay Mayor Brown was recently re elected by a clear majority of 52 percent of Monroetown s voters Her re election however does not show that most people in our town favored Mayor Brown s proposal for tax reduction over that of her opponent Mr Greene who propos

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
401 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
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