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Many people believe that social networking sites (such as facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree?

Many people believe that social networking sites (such as facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. bM0P
It is commonly believed by some people that social networking sites have a detrimental effect on individuals as well as society. Although, there certainly are many advantages of such sites but as a whole it has a negative impact on the society. This essay will discuss both views to this assertion. There are clearly many advantages of social networking sites that are beneficial for the members a society. Firstly, people are able to connect to their distant relatives and friends at any time of the day which otherwise would not have been possible without the advent of such sites. Secondly, these sites act as a platform for many to showcase their hidden talents to a virtual audience by posting it online which has rather become easier for people than ever before. Thus, the individuals get an opportunity to be in the limelight which is overwhelming for their personal growth. On the other hand, social networking sites have had varied negative impacts on the society. People nowadays prefer to communicate over internet rather than physical gatherings within their local communities which has consequently affected the social morals and values that they used to possess. Furthermore, the quality of relationships people used to share has degraded as they tend to spend more time over virtual conversations with fake profiles over the web that mostly result in deceptions. This loss in terms of weak human connections has damaged the communities and society. To conclude, although social networking sites have benefited the growth of individuals but the society seems to degrade with its negative impacts. Therefore, society needs to evolve by bringing about a change that detaches more people out of their virtual lives and helps them connect to the real world.
It is
commonly
believed by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
have a detrimental effect on individuals
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
. Although, there
certainly
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
as a whole it has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
. This essay will discuss both views to this assertion.

There are
clearly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
that are beneficial for the members a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are able to connect to their distant relatives and friends at any time of the day which
otherwise
would not have been possible without the advent of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
.
Secondly
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
act as a platform for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
to showcase their hidden talents to a virtual audience by posting it online which has
rather
become easier for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
than ever
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
.
Thus
, the individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
an opportunity to be in the limelight which is overwhelming for their personal growth.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
have had varied
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
nowadays prefer to communicate over internet
rather
than physical gatherings within their local communities which has
consequently
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
morals and values that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to possess.
Furthermore
, the quality of relationships
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to share has degraded as they tend to spend more time over virtual conversations with fake profiles over the web that
mostly
result in deceptions. This loss in terms of weak human connections has damaged the communities and society.

To conclude
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
have benefited the growth of individuals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
seems to degrade with its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
needs to evolve by bringing about a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
that detaches more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
out of their virtual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them connect to the real world.
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IELTS essay Many people believe that social networking sites (such as facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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