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Law can change human behavior.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Law can change human behavior.To what extent do you agree or disagree? 15b7L
The importance of law, which was always debatable, has now become more controversial. The substantial influence of law has sparked the controversy over the potential impact of this trend on human behavior over the years. It can be said that law can change human behavior to some extent. This essay will elaborate how law can develop social responsibility by penalization and how it is unable to change a human being from inside and thus will lead to a logical conclusion. At the outset, there are numerous reasons how law can change human behavior, but the most conspicuous one stems from the fact that law, which develop social responsibility and the fear of punishment, can insist and sometimes force people to act within the law. For example, traffic rules not only control traffic but also aware people to act accordingly and people know that if they will fail to obey the rules, they will have punishment, fines and cutting demerit points. So, law is vital to maintain everything on earth. Nevertheless, there remain some drawbacks which can certainly overwhelm the potential influence of law on people, but the most alarming one is rooted in the fact that some people are unchangeable and they are aggressive, when they told to obey the rules and regulations and they don't care about the penalties. For example, some people even visiting to jail, they do crime again and break the rules. So, sometimes laws are failed due to certain people and cannot control those things. From what has been discussed above, it can be concluded that the impact of law is prominent, although the way it changes human behaviour should not be overlooked.
The importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
, which was always debatable, has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
become more controversial. The substantial influence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
has sparked the controversy over the potential impact of this trend on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
behavior over the years. It can
be said
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
behavior to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent. This essay will elaborate how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
can develop social responsibility by penalization and how it is unable to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
being from inside and
thus
will lead to a logical conclusion.

At the outset, there are numerous reasons how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
behavior,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the most conspicuous one stems from the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
, which develop social responsibility and the fear of punishment, can insist and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
force
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to act within the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
.
For example
, traffic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
control traffic
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
aware
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to act
accordingly
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
know that if they will fail to obey the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
, they will have punishment, fines and cutting demerit points.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
is vital to maintain everything on earth.

Nevertheless
, there remain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks which can
certainly
overwhelm the potential influence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the most alarming one
is rooted
in the fact that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
unchangeable and
they are aggressive, when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
to obey the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
and
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
regulations and
they don't care about the penalties.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
even visiting to jail, they do crime again and break the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
are failed
due to certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and cannot control those things.

From what has
been discussed
above, it can
be concluded
that the impact of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
is prominent, although the way it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
should not
be overlooked
.
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IELTS essay Law can change human behavior.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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