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It has been a trend in some countries that young people are supported to work and travel over the world before starting an academic life.

It has been a trend in some countries that young people are supported to work and travel over the world before starting an academic life. As there are some benefits of this phenomenon, there are some drawbacks, too. So, in my essay both sides are going to be analyzed by adding some clear examples. Firstly, it is the first wirth mentioning that a gap year between graduating school and starting university can lead the young to achieve good life experiences and may be a real cause of right career choice. For instance, within the break, the young are able to travel to different parts of the world and as a result, that would allow them to know more about the world and would be a chance to meet different sorts of people who have various thoughts and ideas. Because of that the young become more sociable and have opportunity to learn language before university. However, there are some negative points of the notion that some people who prefer working in this period may never return to their study, as they would rather carry on working than going on studying. On this way, a country may lose it's academic scholars. In conclusion, the pros of the view outweigh the cons. And I can say without any hesitation that giving a chance to do journey or work before starting academic studies is a good approach which benefits to develop the students' both personal and professional experiences.

It has been a trend in This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
 countries that You use this word too often, consider replacing it withnewbuddingyouthfulinexperienced
young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
are supported
 to work and travel over the world This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:previouslyprior to
before
 starting an academic life. As there are This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
 benefits of this phenomenon, there are This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
 drawbacks, too. This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:consequently
So
, in my essay both sides are going to be analyzed
 by adding This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :apparent
clear
 examples.

Firstly
, it is the first
Possible spelling mistake found.withbirthworthwidthgirthfirth
wirth
 mentioning that a gap year between The verb 'to graduate' requires the preposition 'from': "graduating from".graduating from
graduating
 school and starting university can lead the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withnewbuddingyouthfulinexperienced
young
 to achieve This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :beneficialproduct
good
 life experiences and may be a real cause of right career choice. For instance
, within the break, the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withnewbuddingyouthfulinexperienced
young
 are able to travel to This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:various
different
 parts of the world and as a result
, that would This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :authorize
allow
 them to know more about the world and would be a chance to This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :attain
meet
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:various
different
 sorts of This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
 who have various thoughts and This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :thoughtsconceptsnotions
ideas
. This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:due to the factin light of the fact thatowing to the fact that
Because
 of that the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withnewbuddingyouthfulinexperienced
young
 become more sociable and have opportunity to learn language This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:previouslyprior to
before
 university.

However
, there are This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:adverse
negative
 points of the notion that This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
 who prefer working in this period may never return to their study, as they would rather
 carry on working than going on studying. On this way, a country may lose Did you mean "its academic scholars"?its academic scholars
it's academic scholars
.

In conclusion
, the pros of the view outweigh the cons. And I can say without any hesitation that giving a chance to do journey or work This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:previouslyprior to
before
 starting academic studies is a This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :beneficialproduct
good
 approach which benefits to develop the students' both personal and professional experiences. 