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In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages for young people who decide to do this ?

In various nations around the world, many people advocate taking a gap year in order to work or travel before beginning one’s tertiary education. While there is clearly a drawback to this, I personally believe that the benefits are more significant. The disadvantage of going on a gap year is that students may end up not returning to their studies. The reason for this is that they may enjoy earning money and becoming financially independent. Therefore, their whole future could be negatively affected as these days it is very important for everyone to graduate with a degree in order to be competitive in the job market. On the other hand, one of the major advantages is that students will be able to expand their horizons if they travel overseas. When students go abroad, they will be exposed to different cultures and customs. For example, westerners visiting a country like Thailand will be able to experience traditional Thai dance like Khon and traditional Thai sport like Muay Thai. As a result, they will gain a deeper understanding of the different places in the world. In addition to that, students who work will be able to learn to appreciate the value of money. This is because they will realize the hard work involved in earning an income. Consequently, they would think more before purchasing anything they desire and may become less impulsive in their spending. In conclusion, the advantages are of greater significance than the disadvantage. Despite the fact that students may not continue on studying at university, they will gain a lot of experience when they travel or learn to better appreciate money when they work. Given this situation, it is recommended that schools should encourage more students to consider taking a gap year.
In various nations around the world,
many
people
advocate taking a gap year in order to work

or travel
before
beginning one’s tertiary education. While there is
clearly
a drawback to this, I

personally
believe that the benefits are more significant.

The disadvantage of going on a gap year is that
students
may
end
up not returning to their

studies.
The reason for this is
that they may enjoy earning money and becoming
financially


independent.
Therefore
, their whole future could be
negatively
affected
as these days it is

very
important
for everyone to graduate with a degree in order to be competitive in the job

market.

On the other hand
, one of the major advantages is that
students
will be able to expand their

horizons if they travel overseas. When
students
go abroad, they will
be exposed
to
different


cultures and customs.
For example
, westerners visiting a country like Thailand will be able to

experience traditional Thai dance like
Khon
and traditional Thai sport like
Muay
Thai. As a

result, they will gain a deeper understanding of the
different
places in the world.

In addition
to that,
students
who work will be able to learn to appreciate the value of money.

This is
because
they will realize the
hard
work involved in earning an income.
Consequently
,

they would
think
more
before
purchasing anything they desire and may become less

impulsive in their spending.

In conclusion
, the advantages are of greater significance than the disadvantage. Despite the

fact that
students
may not continue on studying at university, they will gain
a lot of


experience when they travel or learn to better appreciate money when they work.
Given
this

situation, it
is recommended
that schools should encourage more
students
to consider taking a

gap year.
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IELTS essay In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages for young people who decide to do this?

Essay
  American English
7 paragraphs
293 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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