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In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is positive or negative situation?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is positive or negative situation? dKPP
Having an own property is much more important than renting in some nations. While there are several factors that caused this situation, and I believe that this is a positive trend. There are three main reasons that caused people to prefer to have their own house. Firstly, having an own property is a symbol of social status. Especially in some Asian countries, people consider having a home the most significant symbol of wealth and success. If people did not have their own house, others would not believe that he/she is a successful person. Secondly, some people think that having their own house is a prerequisite for getting married. It is because that having an own house is fundamental to build a family. Finally, without having their own property, most people always feel like lack a sense of belongings, even if they can rent a place to stay. The house owner may terminate the lease agreement and ask them to move out at any time. Although having an own property requires a lot of money, I think this is a positive trend. This would encourage young people to fight for their future. They will make a lot of effort to achieve this goal, thereby boosting the local economy. People have to pay taxes for purchasing a property, and housing developers have to build more houses to cope with the demands. Not only can it increase construction sector’s income, but also helps to raise a country’s fiscal revenue, therefore governments have more funds to allocate to different essential sectors, including schools, health care and public transport systems. In conclusion, there are many reasons to push people to buy their own properties in some areas. From a long-term perspective, this trend will bring more benefits.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Having
an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
property
is much more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than renting in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
nations. While there are several factors that caused this situation, and I believe that this is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
trend.

There are three main reasons that caused
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to prefer to have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
property
is a symbol of social status.
Especially
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Asian countries,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
consider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a home the most significant symbol of wealth and success. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
did not have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
, others would not believe that he/she is a successful person.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
is a prerequisite for getting married. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
is fundamental to build a family.
Finally
, without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
property
, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
always feel like lack a sense of belongings, even if they can rent a place to stay. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
owner may terminate the lease agreement and ask them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
out at any time.

Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
property
requires
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
money, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
trend. This would encourage young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to fight for their future. They will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
effort to achieve this goal, thereby boosting the local economy.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay taxes for purchasing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
property
, and housing developers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
build more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
to cope with the demands. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
can it increase construction sector’s income,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to raise a country’s fiscal revenue,
therefore
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
have more funds to allocate to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
essential sectors, including schools, health care and public transport systems.

In conclusion
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons to push
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
properties
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
areas. From a long-term perspective, this trend will bring more benefits.
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IELTS essay In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is positive or negative situation?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
292 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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