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How to reduce bad effects of tourists who pollutes tourist attraction

How to reduce bad effects of tourists who pollutes tourist attraction r8bAk
In order to overcome this problem, higher authorities should implement some strict rules against those who pollutes these tourist attractions and impose heavy fines who break them. For instance, in last year, at national secturay of dehradrun, everywhere high security cameras have been installed and list of rules have hung on all walls. So whoever caught in those cameras unabiding those rules has impossed to pay heavy fine of rs 5000 and sent to prison for 3months. Due to this, bagpackers must have fear somewhere back of their head. hence, this step will eventually increase awareness in tourists which directly will be attributed to reduce harmul effects.
In order to overcome this problem, higher authorities should implement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
strict
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
against those who pollutes these tourist attractions and impose heavy fines who break them.
For instance
, in last year, at national
Possible spelling mistake found.
secturay
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
dehradrun
, everywhere high security cameras have
been installed
and list of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
have hung on all walls.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
whoever caught in those cameras
Possible spelling mistake found.
unabiding
those
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
has
Possible spelling mistake found.
impossed
to pay heavy fine of rs 5000 and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
to prison for 3months. Due to this,
Possible spelling mistake found.
bagpackers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have fear somewhere back of their head.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
hence
, this step will
eventually
increase awareness in tourists which
directly
will
be attributed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
Possible spelling mistake found.
harmul
effects.

IELTS essay How to reduce bad effects of tourists who pollutes tourist attraction

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
107 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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