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Full-time university students should spend a lot of time studying, but it is essential to be involved in other activities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is true university is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to focus on academics, while having a diverse range of opportunities and activities at the same time. I am in complete agreement with this statement. On the one hand, those who advocate students dedicating on their academics insist that this is the singular learning opportunity. An undergraduate is typically paying large sums of money, burdening themselves with student debt in most cases, in order to make the grade and become an expert in a given field. Freedom from a job allows them to invest fully in academics and learn the theories and skills that will form the basis of their entire professional career and put the knowledge gained into practice. As a result, there is hardly any value in diluting this opportunity by taking up more responsibilities. On the other hand, outside activities are also an important element of higher education for several reasons. Firstly, the students themselves can develop and master vital soft skills required when they enter the labour market. For example, many students nowadays choose to work a part-time job related to their major. This grants them countless practical experience, which can be useful in their chosen professional career. Moreover, taking part in extracurricular activities will become an unforgettable memory later in their life. Even those who do not receive such tangible rewards from their extracurriculars can learn a lot. For instance, a student may opt to become involved in a local charity or a student initiative. These will all be formative experiences and may be more memorable and useful to the students than the subject they study. Given the job hopping frenzy of today’s world, many graduates choose to switch their career paths soon after university regardless, so the respective value of these other activities will increase as they look back on their college experience and recognise what was truly instrumental in their development. In conclusion, it is preferable for university students to split their time between studying and involving in other activities since students not only gain knowledge from texbooks and lectures alone, but they also learn essential skills and have practical experiences.
It is true university is a once-in-a-lifetime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunity
to focus on academics, while having a diverse range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
at the same time. I am in complete agreement with this statement.

On the one hand, those who advocate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
dedicating on their academics insist that this is the singular learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunity
. An undergraduate is
typically
paying large sums of money, burdening themselves with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
debt
in most cases
, in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the grade and become an expert in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
field. Freedom from a job
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
them to invest
fully
in academics and learn the theories and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
that will form the basis of their entire professional career and put the knowledge gained into practice.
As a result
, there is hardly any value in diluting this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunity
by taking up more responsibilities.

On the other hand
, outside
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
are
also
an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
element of higher education for several reasons.
Firstly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
themselves can develop and master vital soft
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
required when they enter the
Possible spelling mistake. ‘labour’ is British English.
labour
market.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
nowadays choose to work a part-time job related to their major. This grants them countless practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
, which can be useful in their chosen professional career.
Moreover
, taking part in extracurricular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
will become an unforgettable memory later in their life. Even those who do not receive such tangible rewards from their extracurriculars can learn a lot.
For instance
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
may opt to become involved in a local charity or a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
initiative. These will all be formative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
and may be more memorable and useful to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
than the subject they study.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Given
the job hopping frenzy of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s world,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
graduates choose to switch their career paths
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
after university regardless,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the respective value of these other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
will increase as they look back on their college
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
and
Possible spelling mistake. ‘recognise’ is British English.
recognise
what was
truly
instrumental in their development.

In conclusion
, it is preferable for university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to split their time between studying and involving in other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
gain knowledge from
Possible spelling mistake found.
texbooks
and lectures alone,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they
also
learn essential
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and have practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
.

IELTS essay Full-time university students should spend a lot of time studying, but it is essential to be involved in other activities.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
356 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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