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Employers sometime ask people applying for for jobs for personal information such as their hobbies and interest, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful.others disagree

Employers sometime ask people applying for for jobs for personal information such as their hobbies and interest, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. others disagree wdKl
In today's world where there is an immense competition, seeking a a job itself is a big milestone of everyone life's, because of which big Corporate seek every type of information of information from the candidate, which sometime leads to the suspicious nature for the firm in mind of candidate. In a very recent survey conducted by the distinguish University XYZ on the big four firms personal information questions such as martial status, hobbies and area of interest found very relevant in judging the candidate skills and capabilities of performing the task. For e. g. if a person is having a interests in history and travelling then the statics shows he/she is most desirable seeker for the tourism industry. Although it's martial status also matter as it's require lot of travelling domestically and even international. However, there is a paradox for the above situation, where organization who took this information could be judge-mental on the deserving person, even if he/she is more qualified for the job and there are some situation where firm asked for irrelevant information like what is the candidate father occupation? , if mother is housewife/Working? , How many siblings are there in the family? . A couple of months before, when I went through the similar experience. In the application form, in personal information section, a question sound like how much is your family earning. And that's make me little un-comfortable as I feel that the question was irrelevant for that Job profile. Based on the above information and example, I feel information which only link to the candidate alone is relevant as it's help organization to explore the person, but seeking family detail's should be avoided as it's make person uncomfortable and harassed because all of us are not from the same background.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's world where there is an immense competition, seeking
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "a" or "a" is left.
a a
job itself is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
milestone of everyone life's,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of which
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
Corporate seek every type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
candidate
, which sometime leads to the suspicious nature for the firm in mind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
candidate
. In a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
recent survey conducted by
After 'the', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'distinguish' is correct. If 'distinguish' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
the distinguish
University XYZ on the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
four firms personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
questions such as martial status, hobbies and area of interest found
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
relevant in judging the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
candidate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and capabilities of performing the task. For
There should be no space here: "e.g.".
e. g.
if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
is having
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "a interest" or simply "interests"?
a interests
in history and travelling then the statics
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
he/she is
Did you mean "the most"?
most
desirable seeker for the tourism industry. Although
Did you mean "its martial status"?
it's martial status
also
matter as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
it's
The word 'require' is not a noun. Did you mean "requirement"?
require
It seems that an article is missing.
lot of
travelling
domestically
and even international.
However
, there is a paradox for the above situation, where organization who took this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
could be judge-mental on the deserving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
, even if he/she is more qualified for the job and there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "situations"?
situation
where firm
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
asked for
irrelevant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
like what is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
candidate
father occupation?
Loose punctuation mark.
,
if mother is housewife/Working?
Loose punctuation mark.
,
How
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
siblings are there in the family?
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
A couple of months
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
, when I went through the similar experience. In the application form, in personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
section, a question sound like how much is your family earning. And that's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
me
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
Possible spelling mistake found.
un-comfortable
as I feel that the question was irrelevant for that Job profile. Based on the above
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
and example, I feel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
link to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
candidate
alone is relevant as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
it's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
organization to explore the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
seeking family detail's should
be avoided
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
it's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
uncomfortable and harassed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
all of us are not from the same background.
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IELTS essay Employers sometime ask people applying for for jobs for personal information such as their hobbies and interest, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. others disagree

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
298 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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